Never Say Never
by Nikki-Chaos
Summary: She left to forget losing someone she loved, now she's back after losing another person. Will her old best friend be able to help her remove the mask that hides her true self. PaulxOC Rated M to be on the safe side.
1. The Pain

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**So my story Where Do I Belong has gone on a small hiatus simply because I didn't like the way I started it, yeah I know it only has one chapter but give me a break will 'ya. So this story is going to take it's place.**

**Please Review and let me know what you think.**

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I was never one for living by the rules, I believed in living my life to the fullest one day at a time. It was the way I lived ever since me and my mother died when I was fifteen. The loss of my mother hit me hard and I want into a shell never letting anyone in and never letting my true self out. My best friend Paul tried but I simply ignored him until he gave up, well I thought he gave up but I heard he'd gotten ill with something. But at the time I didn't care all I wanted was my mother back, the one person who was by my side apart from Paul as I was bullied day in day out. You see my father is full Quileute where was my mother was a pale face which makes me half. And some people decided to make fun of that, and it resulted in both me and Paul getting kicked out of school a few times for fighting my bullies.

After my mother died my father packed us up and moved us to San Diego, California in hopes of starting a new life. And start a new life is what I did. There was one main sport, well night sport that was the main attraction in San Diego and that was Street Racing. I watched and race one night and I knew from that moment on I had found something to make me whole again even if it was for a few moments. A few moments where your whole life depends on how well you can control your car, one slip up and you'll never see your next sunrise.

My dad was always interested in cars; he was always fixing them up in his spare time. So when I knew I wanted to be a street racer I went to him and let's just say he wasn't impressed at all. Though after getting my hands on a scrap car, an empty shell of a Nissan Skyline Gtr and devoting all of my time to bringing it to life. And I mean all of my time, I started skipping school cutting down my sleeping. After seeing this, my dad came around and helped me bring the car to life, but my father being the person he is made me make a promise.

"Keep yourself safe, I don't want to be burying you beside your mother so soon"

When my father said those words to me I saw the main in his eyes and I made that promise and also a promise to my self. A promise that I would never cause my father pain, I would make sure that I was one of the best street racers but at the same time I would also be the safest. As I turned sixteen and devoted my time to getting my driving techniques perfected I met a fellow street racer by the name of Melia, well Melia to me, to everyone in the Street racing business she was known as Long Beach, her racing name, a play on where she was from. She taught me how to push my limits, how to learn where my boundary line was and extend it. The two of us because more them friends, she became like my sister the only person who I let see under the mask I had learnt to wear so well.

Three weeks after meeting Melia I had my first race and I came in first place, I felt something I've never felt before in my life and it filled every single fibre of my body and it made me feel as though I was invincible and could take anything on. After that I kept racing and earned a name for myself, well kind of. I went by the name Chaos and every time I climbed behind the wheel of the car I became her. Kind of like a split personality and it was my way of dealing with things, becoming someone else. My father never asked any questions and I never told him anything, we lived like that up until the morning of my seventeenth birthday. I had just done a race the night before and I was driving Melia home when a car slammed into the side of us slamming the car of the side of the road.

All I remember was the sound of shattering glass and screaming, I woke up in the hospital three days later to my father a look of worry etched on his face and two police officers stood in the doorway. The police officers explained to me that the driver of the other car had been drunk and hadn't seen us, well so he said. The only thing that had gotten to me and caused me to cry a river of tears was when they told me Melia had died on impact. Once again I felt like my whole world was caving in, I had lost another person who had meant so much to me, one of the few people who saw the real me. Realization dawned on me that I only had my father left now and I swore on everything in me that I would never let anyone else get close to me, as that way I wouldn't have to go through the pain of losing another person.

When I was released from hospital I spent every minute of every day in my room, I never left, I never ate and I hardly cared for my appearance. My father seeing the pain was in decided to once again pack us up and move us, but this time he was taking us back to La Push. To begin with I hated the idea of moving back to the place where the memories of losing my mother were, but I realised that here held memories of losing someone so I couldn't really use that as an argument. Plus I could see my father missed his brother, Sam Uley.

I never really liked my Uncle Sam, especially after he broke Leah Clearwater's heart and started dating her cousin. That didn't settle well with me and I hated my uncle since. But my father never saw a problem with his brother so I learnt to keep my opinion to myself. And as I sat there and listened to my father beg me to come back to La Push with him I knew I had to. Ever since my mum died he has done everything he can to keep my happy, the least I could do was return the favour.

So that leads me to where I am now, sat on a plane bound for Port Angeles. I don't know what to expect from going back home, will everything be the way I left it. How is Paul after he got ill when I left. So may questions, with very little answers. But I do know that I am going into this with an open mind, as hell nothing else can happen to turn my world upside down. Can it?

Oh and my names Nikki, I should have said that in the beginning huh?


	2. Stubbornness

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meye****r except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**I'm trying to get better with this longer chapter thing. Please review and let me know what you think.**

**Also I am looking for a Beta reader so if you are interested let me know.**

**This chapter contains foul language, just so you know.**

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_I don't regret this life I chose for me._

_But these places and these faces are getting old,_

_So I'm going home._

_Well I'm going home._

_**Daughtry – Home**_

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As I climbed out of the Rental car and into the early morning breeze of La Push I feel a sense of longing come over my body. A small tear runs down my face and I lift my bandaged right hand up and wipe it away before turning to my father. He sends a small smile my way before passing me the house keys. I take them and walk over to the old house and unlock the door before pushing open the door. The old wood creaking from being abandoned and unused in two years, I walk inside the house and take a deep breathe letting the muskiness of the house and the small trace of my mothers perfume that still lingers in the air fill my nose.

I sense someone stand behind me and turn slightly to see my father stood there with some of the bags in his hands.

"Welcome home baby girl" he smiles before pushing past me gently and heading towards to back of the house where the rooms are

"Yeah home" I whisper before turning on the ball of my foot and heading out to the car

As my hand rests on the boot I look up at the sky to see the grey clouds swirling around, the breeze whipping my long raven hair over my shoulder. I sigh lightly before picking some of our stuff up, careful not to overload myself as that would just result in my father bitching me out. I walk back towards the house. As I enter I see my father holding a picture, a small tear running down his cheek. I shake my head and continue walking to where my old room is situated and push the old door open.

As my Clear blue eyes scan around the room, each little thing the same way it was when we left. Memories of my mother and me sitting in her discussing boys and high school drama fill my head along with other memories. Some of Paul and me when he'd climb in my window in the middle of the night and lay with me knowing neither of us had school the next day seeing as we had once again been kicked out. That in itself made me laugh. I shake my head clearing the memories and place the bags on the floor before heading back down the hallway. I smile as I see my dad bring in the rest of them, closing the front door with his foot.

"This everything?" I ask

My father nods "This is everything"

I nod and begin looking through the bags to find the ones that belong to me. I begin thinking on what my father is going to do to occupy his time seeing as I would be going back to school next week. School the one place I always hated, I just hope people don't recognize me, as hell I've changed a lot in the last two years, my body is a lot more toned and lean then it used to be and my dark raven hair which was once cut short now runs down my back and stops just above my bra strap.

"What are you going to do with your days?" I say rolling my eyes up to my father, voicing my thoughts, well nearly all of them

"I'm thinking of opening a garage" he smiles, a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes

"Cool"

"Yeah, you can work there as well on weekends and after school if you'd like"

"As long as I get paid" I joke

"Nicole Louise Uley do you really think I'd have you working at my garage and not pay you?" he asks also joking

"I never know with you dad"

"There's my girl" My dad smiles and I know what he is indicating. Before both tragedies sarcasm was my main language. Every day I would laugh and joke, even with everything that happened with my bullies I could always make a joke.

"If you need money don't be scared to ask dad" I say seriously

"No Nik that is your money" he sighs

"Dad I won that money fair and square and I will do with it as I please so if you need money for the garage you better ask or I will just pay for it anyway" I say resting my uninjured hand on my hip

My dad nods knowing once I get in my stubborn mood there is no winning, I smile weakly before grabbing the rest of my bags and walking to my room, my father following carrying the three boxes that are also mine. I place the bags on the floor and watch as my dad places the boxes on the bed before sending a small smile my way as he heads out of the room closing the door gently behind him. A sigh leaves my lips as I begin rummaging in the boxes for my ipod docking station. I find it and plug it in before taking my ipod out of my pocket. I unplug the headphones and lay them on the dresser next to the docking station as I place in the Ipod and turn to one of my many playlist's and hit play. I smile softly as the sounds of Daughtry fill my ears and turn round in a circle slowly thinking on the changes I want to make to my room.

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After sorting out my room for a good few hours I lay on my bed my arms crossed underneath my head as I look at the ceiling my music causing a relaxing atmosphere. My forehead crinkles in confusion as the sounds of male laughter fills my ears over my music. I sit up and swing my legs over to the side before pushing myself up slightly. I walk over to my door and pull it open and try to identify the voices and only succeeding in identifying my father. I raise an eyebrow and walk slowly towards the front of the house where the voices are. I lean against the wall and let my eyes trail over the guys sat in the living room, my memory only being jogged when my eyes land on Billy Black.

"Nikki" My father smiles looking up and seeing me stood against the wall "I thought you were sleeping"

"No I was resting" I sigh "Well I was till your obnoxiously loud voices interrupted that"

"Sorry Nik" another voice says and I look over to be met with the eyes of my Uncle Sam

"Its okay" I nod "Question, since when has miracle grow been on the menu of food to eat?" I ask raising an eyebrow as I once again look over the guys all of them laughing from my statement, one person not meeting my eyes which heightens my curiosity

"We just grew"

"I can see that" I nod

"Do you remember any of these guys?" Uncle Sam asks

I shake my head negatively and he takes it upon himself to introduce everyone, I feel like such an idiot as I find out most of them were my friends, well people I talked to but never really bonded with.

"Sorry guys" I smile as Jake, Embry, Quil and Jared stand up and give me a hug

"Its okay Nik Nak we hardly recognized you" Jake smiles

"Yeah sure" I mumble placing a stray piece of hair behind my ear "So who's the grumpy asshole who needs to get the stick out of his ass?" I ask looking around at everyone

"Paul is that anyway to act around your best friend" Jake says walking over hitting Paul around the back of his head

I bite my lower lip as I take in the appearance of my old best friend, and my simple evaluation is that he likes hot as hell. Yeah I always had a crush on Paul for reasons unknown seeing as he was always protecting me from my bullies though he knew with my temper problem I could handle myself. As he looks up and my clear blue eyes meet his dark brown ones I feel my whole world tip upside down and my whole body wants nothing more then to run into his arms and never let go. I snap my eyes away from his and try to sort out these sudden feelings. I look back over to Paul as a growl rips through his chest and he stands up and heads out of the door.

"What the fuck" I whisper before running after him, just dodging my Sam as he reaches out to grab me.

I run out my front door and see Paul heading for the forest and push my legs to catch up with him, once I do I run in front of him and stop causing his steps to falter as he looks down at me.

"What" he growls

"Don't fucking growl at me" I growl back "I want to know what the fuck I've done wrong?" I ask

"Nothing" he sighs running a hand through his hair

"Sure" I say crossing my arms over my chest stubbornly

"Just drop it" he growls "It doesn't matter to you"

"Sure then why are you acting as though I just stole your most prized fucking possession?"

"Just drop it Nicole" he growls again shaking slightly "It's not like you care you fucking left without a fucking goodbye"

"I tried ringing you but your mother said you were ill and the day I left I rang again and left you a voicemail saying I was leaving so don't start that shit" I growl

He growls again and his shaking intensifies, I begin slowly stepping backwards until my back hits a tree before looking to the side to see my father, Sam and the guys watching what is going down.

"Just leave me alone Nicole, I don't want to see you" he growls

"Well I don't want to see you if you're being an asshole" I growl back

He walks past me and into the forest and I sigh dropping my head as pain fills my body as the words Paul has just spoken to me and my reply play in my head like a broken record. I slowly walk back to the house and past the crowd that has gathered outside, my footsteps forced as I try to keep my tears bottled inside. Once in the confides of my room I drop down and let my tears fall, sobs racking my chest as I clutch my pillow close to me.

What has just happened?


	3. Hurt

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**I want to thank pnkrchik for your review.**

**I would also like to thank ArielMermaid for your awesome reviews.**

**You both inspired me to write this chapter.**

**Also I am still looking for a Beta reader so if you are interested let me know**

**Oh and one person has asked me about the way I write and say some words, well sorry to disappoint but I am from England and we say and associate things differently then others, so if you don't understand anything I write let me know and I'll tell you what I mean.**

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_The promises we made were not enough_

_(Never play the game again)_

_The prayers that we have prayed were like a drug_

_(Never gonna help me here)_

_The secrets that we sow we'll never know_

_(Never sing a song a second time)_

_The love we had, the love we had_

_We had to let it go_

_(Never giving in again, never giving in again)_

**_Hurricane – 30 Seconds To Mars_**

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_PAUL'S POV_

"Just leave me alone Nicole, I don't want to see you" I growl at her, my whole body shaking

"Well I don't want to see you if you're being an asshole" she growls back

I walk past her and into the forest, I turn slightly to see her drop her head and I sigh as I feel the pain of what I just said to her fill my whole body. I shake my head and turn back and take of in a run before phasing, landing on all four paws. I shake out my fur before taking off in a run hoping to sort out my thoughts, my thoughts of my ex-best friend. Why out of everyone in La Push did I have to imprint on her, I know for a fact Sam is going to chew my ass out for this.

I sigh as more thoughts of when we were kids fill my head, the times when she would make me laugh with her jokes and sarcasm. The times when she was being bullied and the both of us beat her bullies up, her taking the girls and me the guys both of us not caring that we would once again get kicked out of school.

_You two spent more time out of school then in it_ Jared laughs as he joins in my thoughts

_Yeah_ I sigh

_What's gotten you so angry about imprinting on Nikki?_ He asks

_I don't know_ I sigh

_Sure_ Jared replies _but Sam isn't happy with you. It's not about imprinting on Nik; it's about the fact that when she returned to the house she went straight to her room and cried. You know he cares for her even though she doesn't particularly like him_

_Yeah, I just got really angry. I don't know if it was to do with the imprinting or me just being me_

_I'm surprised you didn't phase_

_I couldn't do that, I wouldn't hurt Nikki _I growl just thinking about phasing and hurting her causes pain to fill my bones

_Is that the imprint talking or just you _Jared asks a small trace of smugness to his voice

_I don't know, all I know is I will never hurt her. Well not intentionally_

I decide to head to my house and phase back so I can think more clearly

_See you on patrol late__r_ Jared calls before I phase out

I grab the pair of cut off's I left in the forest near my house and pull them on before slowly heading into the house and to my room. Once inside I drop down on the bed and let my thoughts run a mile a minute, each one circling around Nikki Uley. The way her new changes make her that much more beautiful, her clear blue eyes that seem to stare straight into my soul, the same eyes I could get lost in for the rest of my life.

"She deserves better then me" I whisper to the darkness

And in myself I know that is the truth, she doesn't deserve someone who is badly tampered and volatile and could hurt her at any given moment. And no matter how much it hurts me to think about it, she deserves someone who can make her happy and give her the life and stability she deserves. And in that moment I decide to fight the imprint, fight it to the point of ripping my heart out.

But will I be able to do that?

Will I be able to ignore the pull, the pull that makes me want to run over to Nikki's now knowing that I made her cry, and pull her into my arms and soothe away her pain. Will I be able to ignore her to the point of her hating me and never wanting to see me again, could I cause her more pain and more tears to fall from them beautiful eyes. I run a hand down my face as I think on ways to avoid Nikki, but each one having the outcome of one of us being hurt, mostly Nikki.

_Nikki's Pov_

The next morning I awoke with a heavy heart, my eyes sore from crying all night. I push myself into a sitting position and run a hand through my hair hissing slightly as I pull at a few knots. I cast my gaze to the right and look out the window to see the sun shinning, a small smile graces my lips before it disappears again as thoughts of last night swirl around my mind. I shake my head and swing my legs over the edge of my bed before pushing myself up. I walk into my bathroom and lean over turning on the shower before looking in the mirror above the sink.

I groan as I see the redness of my eyes, the bags underlining them making it seem as though I haven't slept in days. I sigh and run a brush through my hair to rid myself of the knots before stripping off yesterday's clothes. I throw them in the hamper before climbing in the shower, the heat of the water scolding my skin slightly. I let the water soothe my body before setting about my business. As I rinse the coconut shampoo out of my hair I hear my father call me and sigh as I think on today's events.

A part of me wants to see Paul and apologize for my actions last night, but another part of me wants to avoid him, it's his fault I lost my temper after he lost his with me. I shake my head trying to rid myself of my thoughts, all of them revolving around Paul and finish up my shower. I turn off the water and grab a towel off the rail and wrap it around my body as I walk back into my room and over to my closet.

A knock comes to my door and I sigh before shouting out to whoever it is to talk seeing as I'm getting changed.

"Sorry baby girl" My dad says from behind the wood "I wanted to know if you want to come with me to look at places for the garage"

"Sure dad, I wanted to get a few things today anyway" I call back as I dry my body and slip on my underwear

"Okay"

I hear his retreating footsteps and finish up getting changed before walking back into the bathroom to dry my hair. One drying my hair I throw it up into a loose ponytail as I walk into my room and grab my sneakers from my floor and slip them on. I look back out my window to see some storm clouds and sigh as I grab a hoodie from my closet and slip it on just to be sure.

"Nik you ready" My dad calls

"Few more minutes" I shout as I grab my jewelry and slip it on, my actions stop as I look at my necklace. The necklace Paul got me for my fifteenth birthday.

"Why does everything remind me of him" I sigh before grabbing my back pack off the floor and unlocking my door and heading to the kitchen where I assume my dad is

"So have you got any places in mind?" I ask as I set my back pack on the counter and grab an apple

"There is a place just outside of La Push that has taken my interest, but I want your opinion seeing as you'll be inheriting it when I'm gone"

"Dad don't" I whisper

"Sorry"

"Its okay" I nod containing the tears "I'm sure the place will be awesome" I smile

"Yeah" he nods as he grabs some paperwork and hands it to me knowing it's safe as I slip it in my back pack "So what happened with you and Paul yesterday?"

"Can we not talk about it" I sigh "We just not as close as we used to be"

"Okay" he nods "You ready?" he asks as he grabs the rental keys

I nod and grab my back pack and follow him out of the house, as I walk to the car I see Jared walk past with a girl, he smiles and waves and I return it before climbing in the car after my dad unlocks it. I place my bag between my legs as my dad starts the car and heads in the direction of the garage, well the place for the garage.

"I hope this place is good" I whisper

"Why?" my dad asks

"I just don't want to look at a million places for them all to suck, plus the location of the place will be good for me working after school" I shrug

"That's true"

I nod and couple of minutes later my dad stops outside of what I assume is our destination and climbs out, I follow his movements and walk with him over to a guy. His face pale and what seems to be a fake smile on his face. Since when do pale faces deal with things that are near La Push?

"David" the pale faced guy smiles as he extends a hand

"Marcus" my dad says shaking the pale face's hand "This is my daughter Nikki"

"Pleasure" I nod

The guy nods back and leads me and dad inside; I look around the place, my jaw drops slightly at the size and look over at my dad. He smiles as he sees my reaction and walks over throwing an arm over my shoulder gently.

"Is this the place?" he asks

"If you don't get this place, I will kick your ass" I say rolling my eyes to look up at him

"We'll take it" my father says looking over at Marcus

"Are you sure" Marcus asks walking over

"We're sure" my dad nods and I take my back pack off my shoulder and open it and begin rummaging for the paper work. I hand it to my dad and begin walking around imagining what the place would look like when we're through. One of my ears locked on the conversation that is happening between Marcus and my dad so I know if I will be giving my dad extra money. I smile as I hear it is within my dad's budget and begin thinking on what I can spend my money on, the money I won doing all of the races. I sigh softly as I think on how it seems so long ago that I did my last race, my last race which ended up with the death of my best friend.

"You okay baby girl" Dad asks hugging me gently

"Just thinking" I smile

"About this place?" he asks

"Mh-mm we have a lot of work to do" I chuckle

"We'll get it done, plus Sam and the guys have said they would help. All we have to do is spend the money" he laughs

"I don't see that as a problem for either of us"

"Not with you as my daughter" he laughs as we head back to the car after getting the keys off Marcus. My dad hands me mine and I fish my other keys out of my backpack and slip them on the key ring. I mess with the key in my hand and my dad reaches over and places a hand on my knee in a reassuring way.

"Are you going to be okay when that gets here" he asks

"Yeah" I nod "It will be hard to strip it and start again seeing as how much work you and I put into it but I don't want it looking like it did when Mel died"

He nods in understanding and I smile as I continue to play with the key, the key to my car. The car that caused Mel to die, I knew when I was better I was going to strip it off it's memories and start again, and now my dad has a garage I can ring up the people who are holding the car and get them to send it over. I place the keys back in my bag and look out the windshield to see my dad heading towards Port Angeles; I smile slightly as I begin thinking on the little things I want to buy.

"So what was it you wanted to buy?" my dad asks curiously

"Just some little things to add more change to my room"

He nods and we go silent again, the only sound between us is the purr of the rental car and the music playing softly on the radio.

I laugh at the joke my dad has just told about one of the cashiers we encountered in Port Angeles as he pulls up to our house, my clear blue eyes landing on the one person who has been on my mind all day, Paul. I sigh softly and climb out of the car as my dad turns it off.

"Talk to him, I'll take your bags to your room" My dad smiles as he takes my back pack off me

I nod silently and watch as my dad grabs the backs from the trunk of the car and locks it before walking towards the door; I feel someone's gaze of my face and look over to see Paul staring at me intensely. I grab onto the sleeves of my hoodie and begin twisting it between my fingers as I walk over to where Paul is stood.

"Hi" I whisper

"Hey" he sighs "Look I came to apologize for yesterday" he says rubbing the back of his neck

"Wow so you know how to apologize" I smirk "so which part are you apologizing for, the blowing up at me for no apparent reason or for giving me the idea you don't want to be friends again?"

"Both" he whispers, my ears only just catching the words

"I wish I could believe you Paul, but I can't" I sigh "I know how you are, and I know something like this will happen again"

"I wish we could go back to how things were" he says staring me in the eyes

"We don't always get what we wish for"

I turn on my foot and head towards the house, small tears once again rolling down my face. But I know I did what I had to do, I can't get hurt again and something tells me that's what will happen if I let Paul into my life again.

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**I'm not too sure on this Chapter, so please let me know what you think.**

**So I tried doing Paul's Pov, hope I did him justice**

**I hope this chapter is longer then the last one, and also the link to what Nikki is wearing is on my profile.**

**Also how and when do you think Nikki should find out about Paul and the guys being shape shifters? Let me know your suggestions**


	4. The Truth Comes Out

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**I want to thank Mikayla for your review.**

**I would also like to thank ArielMermaid for your awesome review again. Seriously I love reading your reviews.**

**You both inspired me to write this chapter.**

**Hope you like this chapter, and I am going with the option of milking the story out, maybe when we're in double figures will Nikki learn about the wolves so when we're near there I'll ask how she should find out.**

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_I can't sleep and I can't hide _

_Because these voices in my head are getting louder _

_Getting louder every night _

_I'm living life with no regrets _

_They're on their way but ain't here yet_

_**Hinder – What Ya Gonna Do**_

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I shoot awake and let a small scream leave my lips before I sigh and run a hand through my damp hair, I let my eyes adjust to the darkness as I look out the window to see the moon shining brightly. Once again my dreams we're plagued with nightmares, nightmares of how Mel died. I sigh and throw my covers off my legs and climb out of the bed, the cold air hitting my warm legs causing small goose bumps to rise on my skin. I sigh as I grab a pair of sweat pants off the floor and slip them on over my shorts before grabbing one of my hoodie's from the closet. I open my door quietly before sneaking past my dad's door and over to the front door. After opening the door quietly I head out to the porch and sit down on the steps.

I hear soft footsteps in the distance and turn my head to the right; I clinch my jaw tightly as I see who is walking towards me.

"You'll catch a cold out here" Paul says as he walks nearer to me

"So will you. Seeing as how you're not wearing a shirt" I sigh before averting my gaze

"Why are you up at this time?" he asks sitting next to me, I feel myself heat up instantly

"Couldn't sleep" I sigh trying to ignore the butterflies that are buzzing around my stomach

Out of the corner of my eyes I see him nod and sigh as I begin fingering my hoodie between my fingers, a nervous twitch I inherited off my father.

"Why are you nervous?" Paul asks a small trace of amusement lacing his voice

"I'm not" I sigh "Why am I even trying to lie to you"

"No idea" he chuckles

"What happened to you?" I ask voicing a thought I've had ever since I met him again "You're different?"

"In a good or bad way?" he asks completely ignoring my question

"I haven't decided yet" I sigh "So come on tell me"

"Things have changed Nik" he sighs running a hand through his hair

"You say things have changed, but how have they"

"I can't tell you"

I growl and stand from the steps and turn around heading back into the house, as I close the door I hear a pained howl rip through the night air, my whole body freezes.

"Get over yourself Nik, wolves are not real" I whisper before heading back down the corridor to my room.

I sigh as I close my bedroom door and slip off the hoodie and sweat pants before walking over to my dresser and turn on my Ipod allowing the sounds of Hinder to float through the speakers. I walk back over to my bed and climb under the covers, tucking them under my chin and let a soft sigh pass my lips as I think on the conversation I just had with Paul. Even though I told Paul things couldn't go back to the way they were I could ignore the pull I have to him, the pull that makes me want to throw everything away that means a lot to me and just give into Paul. The pull that makes me want to just hand him my heart and ask him to care for it as no one else can have it.

I shake my head to clear my thoughts and close my eyes and concentrate on the music playing around my room, sleep finally starting to settle in once again.

* * *

I rub my eyes groggily as I head towards the kitchen, I stop dead as I see my Uncle Sam stood talking to my dad, he turns and smiles softly at me before looking back at my dad.

"We're sorting the garage out today" My dad smiles as he hands me a glass of orange juice

"Cool" I say before placing a hand over my mouth to cover my yawn

"The guys are going to help as well" Uncle Sam

"Does that mean Paul?" I ask staring him in the eyes

"No Paul has something to do so does Jared" he sighs and I can tell he is hiding something but decide to ignore it, if it was important he would tell me

I nod and take a small sip of my orange juice as my dad hands me a plate of breakfast, I begin eating slowly. Not wanting to show my true hunger seeing as I haven't eaten since we got here. A small fact which caused me and my dad to have a huge argument, and I don't feel like having another one. My dad heads out of the kitchen and I feel my Uncle Sam's eyes on me and sigh before rolling my eyes up to look at him.

"What?" I ask

"I hear you talked to Paul last night" he says crossing his arms over his chest

"So what if I did, what is it to you?" I ask

"Give him a chance Nik Nak" he sighs "Things have changed"

"See that is the problem, what things have changed. I hate secrets and I know you're keeping them so is everyone else" I sigh pushing my plate away from me

"It's not my place to tell you" he sighs

"Well until someone does I don't really feel like giving Paul a chance for anything. Not even friendship. I don't want to see him"

I stand from the stool I was sitting on and head to my bedroom, slamming the door behind me. I slide down the door and breathe deeply trying to calm my tears down, as I think on what I have just said. I do want to see Paul, it hurts when I don't but I am not one who likes secrets being kept from her so until someone grows some balls and tells me I don't really see me and Paul having my chance of any kind of relationship or friendship.

I stop my trail of thoughts as something hits me in the face, relationship. Not once did my Uncle Sam mention a relationship all he told me was to give Paul a chance. It was me that started the thoughts off in my head about a relationship. I grumble as I stand from the floor and head into my closet grabbing some clothes for today. I don't really feel like helping with painting or cleaning so I might as dad if I can order the stuff we need. Once dressed I grab my shoes from the floor and head back into the kitchen where uncle Sam, my dad and now Jacob who has joined us are sat around waiting.

"You ready?" Dad asks and I nod

He nods back and I sigh as I slip on my shoes and follow my dad out the front door and head over to the car, slipping into the passenger seat as dad unlocks the car. I hear him exchange a few words with Sam and Jacob before climbing in the driver's seat. I mumble something under my breath as dad starts the car and country music flows out of the speakers.

"Dad"

"Yeah baby girl" my dad sighs, tiredness coating his voice

"Can I just do the orders today?" I ask

"I was going to ask you to do it anyway" he chuckles

I smile softly before looking out the window, we pull up to the garage and I climb out of the car and smile as I see all the guys outside joking around. My dad hands me his phone and I smile as I lean into the car and grab the catalogue out of the back seat before walking over to near the forest edge and sit down. I begin thumbing through the pages looking at things and deciding what would be better for the garage, prices never once crossing my mind. After ordering nearly everything we need I sigh and take a breather.

"Shouldn't you be helping" A voice says from above me and I look up to see Jacob smiling down at me

"I am helping, I'm ordering everything" I chuckle

He laughs and settles his tall body on the ground next to me; he leans his arm on one of my right knee and looks over the catalogue.

"These are some pricey stuff" he comments

"Eh money isn't really an option" I shrug

He laughs but its cut short as we hear a growl; I look up and see Paul stood there, a glare fixed on his face as he looks at Jacob. His eyes snap to me and his gaze softens before he turns and helps Sam with whatever he was doing.

"I thought he was busy" I muse

"He was but he isn't now" Jacob shrugs causing my right knee to knock into my left one "So he decided to help"

"Huh"

"So come on tell me, how isn't money an option"

"You are too nosy Jacob Black" I laugh

"So I've been told"

"Well thanks to the job, if you want to call it that, I had when I was in San Diego I have enough money to probably buy everything that is in this catalogue ten times over"

"Wow nice job"

"Yeah" I whisper

"What was it?" he asks

I look up and see Jacob staring intently at me, I sigh and lift my gaze higher to see Sam, Paul, Jared and Embry standing not too far from us, there gazes locked on me as well. I raise my eyebrow slightly but ignore it and begin thinking on how to tell Jacob what my job was.

"I was a street racer" I comment "Like in the films Fast And Furious" I say as I see Jacob slightly confused

"That is dangerous" Paul says a harshness underlining his voice making me lift my gaze and look at him

"I didn't care" I shrug "I wanted an escape from what I was feeling after my mum died, and I found it in Street racing. It became my way of dealing with things after my mum died, nothing mattered to me when I was behind the wheel, not my dad, not my life, nothing. I won a lot of races, and each time I felt whole"

"What happened?" Embry asks stepping forward slightly "What made you come home?"

"You don't have to tell us if you don't want to" Sam says in a reassuring way

"My last race was on the night before my seventeenth birthday, and the morning of it I was driving my best friend Melia home. Mel had taught me near enough everything I knew about being a street racer. And next thing I knew something hit the passenger side of the car causing the car to go off the side of the road. The impact killed Melia instantly, me I was alive and woke up in hospital with scratches and nothing more" I say holding my injured hand up that is still bandaged

"Dad moved us back here as I once again became the zombie I was after mum died"

I raise my hand and wipe away the tears, avoiding looking at all the people who are staring at me. I know if I look at them all I will see is sympathy and I don't want sympathy. I don't want anything from them. I stand up pushing the catalogue and Jacob's arm off my knees and take off in a run into the forest.

"NIKKI" someone calls behind me and I push myself to run faster, tears still falling from my eyes causing my vision to be blurred.

I wipe away the tears and duck under trees and jump over fallen ones, someone grabs my arms pulling me back into them just as I get ready to run into a clearing. I look up to see Paul looking down at me, his dark eyes ablaze with anger. Anger directed at me.

"Get off" I growl

"No" he growls back tightening his hold on my arm

"Paul let go you are hurting me" I whisper

He looks down at me before snapping his head up and looking at something that is out in the distance. I try to get his hand off me, causing his hand to tighten around my arm causing me to cry out in pain.

"Come with me" he says sternly

"No"

He growls and let's go of my arm, I go to run, but Paul grabs my hips and picks me up throwing me over his shoulder causing my head to hit against his back. He takes off in a run and I sigh as I give up the fight. We break through the forest and I see we are back outside the garage. Paul puts me down and I sigh as I look down at my arm to see a red hand mark.

"That is so going to bruise" I grumble

"Sorry" Paul sighs

"Fuck off" I growl and head over to the rental car and climb in the passenger seat. I watch out of the rear view mirror as Paul talks to Sam before him and the rest of the guys head into the forest. I raise an eyebrow in suspicion but drop it as my dad climbs in the car next to me.

"What's happening?" I ask

"Nothing for you to worry about" he sighs starting the car up ending the conversation

* * *

I run my hand through my hair as I sit on the porch swing later that afternoon, I haven't seen a single one of the guys since Paul went into the weird mood and they all headed into the forest. Goosebumps rise up on my skin as the cool afternoon breeze runs over my skin and I grab the blanket next to me and cover my legs as I continue reading the book that lies in my hand. I sigh as I throw the book to the floor after realizing I have been reading the same sentence for the last ten minutes.

"What did the book ever do to you?" A voice comments

"Go away Paul" I sigh

"I came to apologize, I know I acted weird and I hurt you. I didn't mean to" he sighs

"Well you did, so could you do me a favor and fuck off, because I don't do people hiding secrets from me so until you grow a pair of balls and tell me what is really happening I don't want to see you, I don't even want to hear your name"

"If that is what you want"

I look over and see him walking away, a part of my heart breaks at the sight. Somewhere deep inside of me I thought Paul would have fought, begged me not to say those things. But no instead he just walked away. And in that instant I knew I was better off without Paul.

Or am I?

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**So I rewrote this chapter ten times and I still don't like how it is. Oh well I hope you guys like it.**

**What Nikki is wearing is linked on my profile.**

**And I have a new Paul story out called Secrets Seal Our Fates. Please check it out**


	5. My wolf

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**I want to thank ladyMiraculousNight for your review.**

**I would also like to thank ArielMermaid for your awesome review again. And to answer your question I do have an obsession with Paul, after watching New Moon and Eclipse my obsession for him was re born.**

**And I've decided who needs a Beta when I have awesome reviewers. So please make sure when you review you let me know what you liked about the story and what you didn't as it helps me improve the next chapter and also my writing.**

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_Well every problem is gone because_

_I flew everywhere with love inside of me_

_It's unbelievable to see how love can set me free_

_**Chris Brown ft Keri Hilson – Superhuman**_

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It was now the day before I started school again, a fact I wasn't looking forward to when the realization that I would have to see Paul hit me like a slap in the face. It has been three days since I last saw him and he seems to be sticking to what I said, and so do the guys not once do they speak his name when I am anywhere near. And although it hurts me I am thankful that they listened to me.

I sigh as I look over the garage, within three days we have managed to get it clean, re painted and thanks to everything being delivered yesterday, looking like a garage should. Seeing as how I am not eighteen yet Uncle Sam is my dad's business partner with me still inheriting the garage when my dad dies. And also thanks to my dad being the charity case he is, he's given the guys jobs, including Paul. Which made me beg on me knees for my dad to not put our two work rota's together. As I can ignore him when I'm home but there is no way I could ignore him at work and I don't think people would be happy if they saw me throwing a wrench at his head.

Ever since I told Jake, hang on I mean Jake and near enough all the guys what had happened in San Diego they have been walking around me as though I am a ticking time bomb ready to explode, a fact that makes me angry. I confronted the others on why they were around me and Jake and they said they were curious as to why my eyes showed pain. An explanation that made me laugh and make them promise to never get in my business again, and seeing as how I threatened their man hood they made the promise, scared looks on their faces.

I shake my head and return to my observation of the garage, I smile as I realize I now have something to take my mind off things when my dad walks over and points behind me. I turn and see a lorry stopping outside the garage and walk outside.

"Nicole Uley" the driver asks

"That is me"

"Your car from San Diego"

I nod and he hands me the paperwork I have to sign, I sign it and he takes it back before walking to the back of the lorry. I feel a hand on my shoulder and look up to see my dad stood there; his face emotionless and I know in that instant what he is doing. He is getting ready to hold me if I breakdown, I look back to the car and I feel my insides drop as I look over the dents, blood still on the windshield.

"Oh god" I gasp before running into the garage and into the office area.

"Nik" a soft voice asks and I look up to see Jacob stood in the doorway

"Yeah" I whisper

"What's wrong?" he asks

"That's my car, the car that Melia died in" I say before dropping to my knees the tears flow down my face. Warm arms engulf me and I grab onto Jacob's shirt as the tears show no sign of stopping.

"I'm sorry" he says into my hair as he rubs my back

"Baby girl" my dad asks from somewhere behind Jacob

I look up and my eyes meet his "Can some of you guys strip it, I can't bring myself to do it" I sob

"Sure angel, leave it to us. Do you want Jake to take you home?"

I look up at Jake and he nods before picking me up "The car is in here so I think you might want to hide your face"

I nod and hide my face in his chest as he walks out to where I assume one of the cars are parked. I hear a car door opened before I'm placed inside, I let go of Jake and he shuts the door before running around to the driver's seat. I grab the seatbelt and fasten myself in as he starts up the car and begins the drive back to my house.

"You ready for school tomorrow" he asks

"Not really" I sigh "But I know my dad wants me to graduate so I'll attend just for him" I chuckle

"That's dads for you" he laughs

"Yeah" I whisper

A silence spreads over us and I sigh as I look out the window to see us outside my house, I undo my seatbelt and climb out the car, I stop and turn to look at Jake.

"Thanks" I smile

"Are you going to be okay on your own?" he asks

"I'll be fine" I smile

"Okay" he nods "See you tomorrow"

"Tomorrow" I smile

I close the car door and move away as Jake backs out of the driveway, I wave to him and he waves back before heading back to the garage, I sigh and take the house keys from my pocket and unlock the door heading inside, I look at the time to see it's too early to be even thinking about heading to bed. I walk into the kitchen and sigh as I begin looking in the cupboards for something to eat but finding nothing.

I lean against the counter and look out the window at the forest surrounding the house and decide to go for a walk. I grab a jacket off the coat rack and head outside locking the house back up behind me. As I walk through the forest dodging trees that are hanging too low and stepping over fallen trees I feel all of my worries disappear as the serenity of the forest fills my body, after around ten minutes of walking I come across the clearing I saw three days ago and walk forward through the trees and move around in a circle taking in the beauty. I see a tree stump and walk over and sit down letting the breeze blow my long hair around my face.

As I sit there in the quiet I find all my thoughts rotating back to Paul, and the look in his eyes as he walked away. The hurt and pain that flashed over his face before he did what I asked. I sigh and let my thoughts continue moving at a fast pace, all of them filled to the brim with Paul and I find myself singing the song I've been writing about Paul but have yet to finish.

"Don't make a sound

I might be dreaming boy

So don't wake me now

Let me believe in this for one more minute

One more second

One more smile and

One more touch then we'll go

Lost in your eyes

Yes baby always tangled up in your lies

It's getting harder and I've seen all the signs

I got to get up and leave now"

A twig snaps to my right and I stop singing and feel my whole body freeze up, I look to the right and my breath catches in my throat as I see a huge silver and grey wolf staring at me.

"Holy shit" I whisper as I look the wolf over

The wolf steps out of the forest and walks towards me slowly, my eyes stay focused on the wolf's as it drops to the ground In front of me. Before I know what I'm thinking I find myself kneeling down in front of it, my hand extended in front of me. I breathe out slowly as I run my hand over its fur, smiling softly at the softness. I sigh as I pull my hand back from the wolf's fur and it stands up, easily making my five foot four frame seem like that of a gnome's. it looks at me and then back to the forest before taking off in a run. I stand up and look at where the wolf has just ran off to.

"I need some sleep" I whisper

I decide to head back home, all my thoughts now filled with the wolf and the sense of familiarity I felt as I looked in it's eyes. As I reach the house my dad pulls up and I smile.

"Went for a hike?" he asks a small chuckle following his words

"Yeah" I nod "I needed to clear my head"

"Well at least you came out" he laughs

I laugh and head into the house; I look at the time to find it's been four hours since I returned home. I sigh and head into the living room and drop down onto the couch tucking my legs underneath me.

"Jake and Sam got the car stripped and got rid of all the parts so all the car is now is an empty shell for when you want to work on it"

"Thanks dad, I don't know what came over me I just couldn't look at the car" I sigh

"We understood" he says laying a hand on my shoulder "Are you hungry" he asks

"No I'm going to go get an early night ready for school tomorrow"

He nods and I hug him before heading to my room, I get changed into my pajamas and climb under the covers and close my eyes allowing sleep to bring dreams of the wolf, _my wolf_.

* * *

"Baby girl"

I groan and open my eyes to see my dad stood over me "come on time for school"

I sigh and he heads out of the room, I grip my head slightly as I feel a headache coming on from all the sleep I got last night and climb from my bed softly before heading into the bathroom to grab a quick shower. Once finished with my shower I wrap a towel around my body and begin drying my hair allowing it to flow down my back in its soft natural curls. I head into my room and grab some clothes getting changed. As i go to grab the necklace Paul bought me I think differently and grab another one slipping it around my neck soon followed by my bracelets and rings.

I grab my bag and my new phone and head out of my room and into the kitchen, I stop as I see Embry and Jake in the kitchen eating the breakfast my dad has laid on the table.

"We are you escorts to school" Embry smiles

"Nice" I smirk "But I so didn't want to see what you were eating"

he laughs and finishes his food as I sit at the table and eat my breakfast. When we're done I say bye to my dad and follow the guys out to Jake's car, Em climbing in the back allowing me to sit in the passenger seat.

"So you looking forward to being back at this school" Em asks

"Not really" I laugh "But seeing as I was always in fights I never really saw it that much"

"You intending on fighting this time" Jake asks

"If people annoy me then yes" I shrug

"You're like the female version of" Embry says before stopping, his sentence unfinished

"I was always told that?" I sigh as I realize who he is talking about

"Sorry" Em mumbles

"It's fine"

The rest of the car drive is quiet as I listen to the music playing on the radio, as Jake pulls into the school I can't help the nerves that fill my body making me want to jump out of the car and run home. I sigh as Jake comes to a stop and undo my seatbelt and climb out of the car slipping my back pack onto my right shoulder. As I await the guys to climb out of the car I let my clear blue eyes scan over everyone and smirk as they land on a few of my bullies, the minute they meet my gaze they look away and at anything but me.

"Oh it's good to be back" I mumble

"Come on"

Jake places an arm over my shoulder as he leads me to the office, I walk in and talk to the old woman, someone I don't recognize, and get my schedule and locker combination before heading back out of the office to see Jake stood their waiting for me, his gaze one someone else. I follow his gaze to see Paul stood down the corridor, leaning against a locker, Jared stood next to him talking animatedly but Paul doesn't seem to be listening his gaze fixed on me.

"Where is your locker?" Jake asks breaking me out of the staring contest with Paul

I hand him the small piece of paper and his sighs running a hand through his hair "That's the locker that Paul is leant on"

"You're shitting me" I sigh

"No, the one where Jared is stood is Paul's"

"Come on, I have to face him one time or another"

I grab Jakes hand and pull him down the corridor, stopping in front of Paul and looking up at him.

"Do you want to move" I ask

"Why?" He asks his gaze hardening as he sees my hand in Jakes

"Because you are leant against my locker"

He pushes off it and moves to the side, I let go of Jakes hand and open the locker, glancing quickly at my schedule to see what lesson I have first before grabbing my books and throwing my bag in the locker. I shut the locker and sigh as I walk away, my gaze not once meeting Paul's.

"What is your first lesson?" Jake mumbles following behind me

"English"

"Come on then"

He grabs my hand again and begins leading me through the mass of people gathered in the corridors talking amongst themselves. We reach the classroom and I smile at the teacher as I recognize her and hand over my slip of paper she needs to sign. She tells me to sit in the desk that is to the right of Jake and I nod as I walk over and drop into it.

"Paul sits behind you" Jake says leaning over to talk into my ear as he sits in his seat

"Thought I'd let you know" he says as he senses my awkwardness

"I'm not going to be able to avoid him am I?" I ask

"Not here in school" Jake says before sitting back in his seat

"Great" I whisper before opening my notebook and beginning to doodle as I await the bell to ring signaling the start of class.

As I hear his voice enter the room I look up and my eyes meet his, I sigh as I see the hurt flash in them before switching to emotionless, I drop my head and let a small tear run down my face before swearing to myself that I will shed no more tears for Paul Walker.

_He isn't worth my tears_ I say to myself as I wipe at my face and look back up to the front of the class. I hear the chair move behind me and sigh as I try my hardest to ignore his presence and force myself to stay looking forward.

Near the end of the class a note lands on my book and I sigh as I open it.

_I'm sorry_

I scrunch the note up and place it in my pocket, anger filling my veins, why I don't know. Maybe because he thinks an apology on a note will make me forgive. If Paul Walker thinks that with small gestures and notes I will run into his open arms then he is sadly mistaken. I am going to make him work for our friendship, and no matter how much it will hurt me I will ignore him and hate him until he starts fighting. If he doesn't I know I mean nothing to him.

Once the bell rings I stand from my seat and collect my books getting ready to follow Jake out of the door when a warm hand grabs mine halting my movements. I look over to see Paul staring down at me.

"Nikki" he sighs

"Paul let me go" I say softly "I mean what I said and even though you are all that I think of I don't go back on my words"

"So you won't even be my friend?" he asks

"Not until you tell me the secret that surrounds you" I breathe before turning and walking over to Jake.

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**So like the last chapter I kept re writing this one as I didn't like it**

**But I hope you guys do.**

**Let me know what you think.**

**Also my other Paul story Secrets Seal Our Fates has been updated so check that out if you want.**

**And what Nikki was wearing for school is posted on my profile**


	6. I Love you

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**I was in a good mood so I decided to update again on the same day. I know it's short but it is late here in the UK and I am meant to be doing homework.**

**Aren't I a nice person?**

**So come on people I want your opinions and I mean your full opinion of each chapter.**

**Don't forget that my other Paul story Secrets Seal Our Fates has also been updated today.**

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_You know I love you, I really do_

_But I can't fight anymore for you_

_And I don't know, maybe we'll be together again_

_Sometime, in another life_

_In another life_

_**In Another Life – The Veronica's**_

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By the end of the school day I had made two friends, Kim who at lunch I found out was Jared's girlfriend and Marie who had the biggest crush ever on Jacob. I had also found out that since I left Paul had become a womanizer and had slept with half of the school, yeah that small fact didn't go over well with me and I threatened to Jake that I was going to cut Paul's dick off and feed it to a stray dog. Don't ask me why I made that threat I just did.

I wave goodbye to Embry and Jake as I head into the house after school and sigh as I place my bag on the floor, the quietness of the house letting me know that my dad is at the garage and wont be back for another few hours. I grab an apple from the fruit bowl and head up to my room and begin doing some homework, I place my bag on the bed and get changed out of my school outfit into a pair of sweat pants and a baggy shirt before settling myself on the bag and begin the task of doing homework. A fact I so did not miss.

Half way through my math's homework a knock comes to the front door and I growl in annoyance before standing from the bed and heading to the door pulling it open. I growl again as I see Paul stood there, a black body fitting shirt and a pair of cut offs hanging on his body. I snap my eyes to his face as I realize I have just been looking him over and see a smirk on his face.

"Yes" I ask agitated

"I came to talk" he sighs

"Do you know how to give up?" I ask

"No not really" he laughs

"What is it Paul?" I ask "What makes you keep coming after me, Is it because I am probably the only girl minus Kim in the whole of La Push that you haven't slept with and you see me as a challenge"

"No Nikki that's not it" he growls

"Then what is it, please let me know as I don't understand this obsession you have with me"

"I love you" he says and I strain my ears to hear him

"Come again, I didn't hear that" I growl

"I fucking love you" he seethes "That is why I am putting myself through this pain of being shot down by you. Every glare and nasty word you say to me hurts me but because I love you I put myself through the pain"

I stare at him my mouth wide open as I try to come up with something to say to him, Paul growls and steps forward so he is in front of me and crashes his lips against mine. Before I can even attempt to comprehend what is happening I find myself kissing him back. I pull out of the kiss and step back as my mind reels from the kiss.

"Please leave" I whisper

"I won't give up Nikki" Paul says before walking away

I run forward and close the door before leaning against it, my knees give out and I slip to the floor. My lips tingle as I remember the kiss I have just shared with someone who I thought was my best friend, but the more I think on it I come to the conclusion that my feelings have changed and I find myself liking Paul more then a friend, more like someone I want to spend my life with. I snap my eyes open and stare ahead at me as my mind reels at the idea of loving my best friend.

"This shit is too complicated" I groan standing up and heading back to my room. I stop short as I look out the window and see the grey and silver wolf staring back at me from the forest edge.

"First I thought wolves weren't real now I keep seeing that grey and silver one" I sigh "I am so messed up in the head"

I shake my head and sit back down on my bed and continue doing my homework, my thoughts revolving around both Paul and the Wolf that is currently stood outside my house staring at the my bedroom window. I finish up my homework and set the books back in my bag before grabbing my TV remote and turn the TV on.

"Baby girl I'm home" my dad calls through the house "I got dinner"

I stand from the bed and walk out the room and to the kitchen, I smile at my dad as he hands over the takeaway that he grabbed.

"So how was school?" he asks

"Good, no bullying" I smile "I made two new friends"

"Oh really"

"Yep Kim and Marie, though no one can replace Mel"

"You need to let her go Nik" he sighs "I don't mean it in a bad way I just know that you blame yourself for her death and if you keep doing that then you are going to drive yourself insane"

"I'm fine dad"

"You sure"

"Not really but I'll be okay"

He nods and we eat in silence, after eating I throw my trash away and bidding my dad goodnight I head back to my room. I grab one of the DVD's off the stand, a small chuckle escaping my lips as I see it's Fast and Furious and slip it in my DVD player before settling under the covers.

* * *

After watching all three of the fast and furious films I find myself crying, crying because each of the films reminded me of my races. I stand from my bed and head through the house and out onto the front porch. The night air blows my hair around my face as I sit there crying silently.

"You know if you keep coming out here at night you will get a cold"

"Why do you care Paul" I say looking up at him through tear filled eyes

"I told you earlier" he sighs sitting next to me

I look forward and continue crying, I hear Paul sigh and pull me into his arms, the safety I feel from the simple gesture causing my tears to fall faster.

"I'm sorry you're in pain" he whispers

"Why do everyone I love keep leaving me?" I ask

"I don't know baby" he says kissing the top of my head

"I want the pain to end" I sob

Paul sighs again before hugging me closer to his body, I bury my head in the crook of his neck as I wrap my arms around his torso. My mind going blank as I inhale his scent, I know I tried telling myself I don't need Paul. As a friend or as someone who is just there for me, but in this moment I need Paul like nothing else.

What is happening to me?

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**So the last part of this chapter goes to ladyMiraculousNight who planted the idea in my head for Paul to be there when Nikki has one of her breakdowns.**

**So anyway I didn't like this chapter, and I know Nikki seems very Bi Polar but can you blame her with what she went through. Anyway let me know what you think seeing as I updated twice in one day just for you guys.**


	7. Jealousy

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**So seeing as I don't really like Renesmee, I made Jake imprint on Marie. I had to she had the biggest crush ever on him.**

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_Once in a lifetime you'll find someone heaven sent for you_

_For a lifetime you'll feel there's a reason to believe_

_In a love that's meant to be_

_**What About Love – Meat Loaf**_

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I groan as the sun hits my face and sit up in my bed, a small smile on my face as I remember last night. Paul held me all the way through the tears, he listened to my rambling and didn't once say anything, he just listened. After my small breakdown I decided to give him a chance, I told him we're not friends and we're not together he has to work to get either of them and he said he would. And I know he will, something tells me that he is going to fight for me.

I run a hand through my hair and look at the time to see I woke up late and don't have time for a shower, a small sigh leaves my lips and I walk over to my closet and begin looking for some clothes. After finding an outfit I get changed and run a brush through my hair before throwing it up into a loose ponytail. A knock comes to the front door and I growl before heading out of my room and over to the door unlocking it and pulling it open.

"Morning" Paul smiles making me groan

"How can you be so cheery" I yawn

"Sleep in" he asks laughing

"Yeah"

I move out of the doorway and he walks into the house and pulls me into a small hug.

"Go finish getting ready, I'm driving you to school"

I nod and head back into my room and begin placing on my jewelry, I grab the necklace Paul gave me and smirk as I slip it over my neck. I grab my back pack and make sure I have all my homework before heading out of my room shutting the door behind me. I walk back into the kitchen to see Paul rummaging around in the cupboards.

"You guys seriously have no food" he grumbles

"Blame Embry and Jake" I chuckle

"Come on" he says and heads to the door holding it open for me, I turn once the door is closed again and lock it up before slipping the keys in my pocket. I follow Paul to his truck and climb in the passenger seat and smile as I breathe in Paul's scent. A scent that calms me in a way that has never happened before, Paul climbs in the driver's seat and I smile as he starts the car and begins the journey to school. The only noise between the two of us is the classic rock music playing softly from the radio. As we pull up to school I as Marie glancing at me, a small smile on her face.

"She has a crush on Jake doesn't she?" Paul asks

"Yeah she does" I laugh "I don't even know if he's looked at her"

"Gotta love high school" Paul laughs

I shake my head and climb out of the truck as he shuts it off and close the door shouldering my bag as I walk over to Marie.

"Morning" I smile

"Morning" she smirks

"What's with the smirk?" I ask

"Nothing" she shrugs innocently

"Okay then" I chuckle

"Come on girls, the bell is going to ring in a couple of minutes" Paul says as he wraps an arm around my shoulders and leads me into the school, Marie walking next to us rambling about Jake. As me and Paul get ready to leave Marie so we can head to our lockers, she stops her rambling about Jake and looks to me a small smirk on her face.

"So Nik seeing as we have a free period second seeing as the teacher is ill or something like that, do you want to meet me in the library and we can work on our English project"

"Sure" I smile

"See ya second" She calls as she walks down the hallway her locker is situated in

"See ya" I chuckle

"She is crazy" Paul laughs "Reminds me of Kim"

"Don't tell me Kim had a crush on Jared"

"Times Maries by ten and you have Kim's"

"Great" I sigh a small trace of amusement lacing my voice

Paul laughs as we grab our books and head to Math's, just entering the room as the second bell rings and head to our seats. I see Jake's empty and turn to look at Paul.

"He got in late last night" Paul says as he notices my look "Don't worry he'll be here by lunch"

I nod and turn back to the front of the class and listen as the teacher drones on about nothing of interest, my head nearly hitting the table as I feel a sense of tiredness wash over me. When the bell rings I head to my locker and place in my math's book before grabbing my English stuff and head off to the library. I spot Marie sat at one of the tables and walk over and sit across from her.

"So I was thinking of us doing this" She says handing me a piece of paper with a plan written on it of our project

"Sounds good" I smile

"So as we work I was thinking we could play twenty questions" she smirks

"Why?" I ask

"So I can get to know you a little better and you can get to know me" she shrugs

"Sounds good" I agree not knowing that Marie is doing this for Paul.

"So favorite color" she asks as I begin the poster

"Grey"

"Favorite film"

"Anything to do with vampires or street racing"

"Who is the one person who annoys you to no end but you can't help but feel something for?" she asks

"Paul" I say before I can comprehend what I just said

"Oh really"

I look to her face to see a shit eating grin spread across her face and feel my cheeks heat up.

"Tell me more" she smirks

"I don't know why but he just gets under my skin but at the same time I like it. I love how he gets angry so fast over something that means a lot to him" I shrug "And don't get me started on his body. Its official I like Paul more then I should"

"He's got a nice one huh" she asks "And there is nothing wrong with liking him Nik"

I just nod and bite my lip; she laughs and continues the questions as I finish the poster. By the time the bell rings for third period, we have the poster and some of the calling cards done, and Marie knows nearly everything about me and me her.

"See you at Lunch Marie" I smile

"See you then"

I shake my head and head off to my biology lesson with Kim; hopefully she will be as good company as Marie.

* * *

_Paul's Pov_

I see Marie walking towards me and smirk as I see a smirk on her face, she walks beside me as we enter our biology class and she sits next to me. We listen to the teacher as he tells us we have free reign seeing as something happened to his lesson plan. As the class begins chattering I turn to Marie.

"So" I ask

"Her favorite color is grey; she loves any type of films to do with Vampires or street racing. And you annoy her to no end but she likes you more then she should"

"That's the short summary?" I ask

"Pretty much" Marie shrugs

I smile as I think on the short things Marie has just told me, Nik's favorite color is Grey, she loves films to do with vampires, well that isn't a good thing. But I annoy her to no end and she likes me more then she should. Well if my ego hadn't grown when she said she'd give me a chance it sure as hell did now.

"Paul" Marie asks softly breaking me from my thoughts

"Yeah"

"What is it about Nikki that you like; I've never seen you chase a girl like this"

"To be honest Marie I don't know. I mean I love her and every little thing about her. Like how her moods change faster then that of a pregnant woman, her smile. The way she can make a joke out of anything and have everyone around her smiling, the way her skin glows and I sound like a love sick fool don't I"

"Yes Paul you so do" Marie laughs "But promise me one thing"

"What?" I ask raising an eyebrow

"You won't hurt her. I can still see the hurt in her eyes and from what Jared has told me about Nikki and the way she used to be I know it is going to take a while before the old Nikki is back and I don't want her hurt. I know I have only known her for a day but she is fast becoming my best friend"

"Don't worry I wont hurt her" I sigh "Not intentionally any way"

She nods and we continue our conversation about Nikki, Marie filling me in on the other little things that Nikki I told her. I know it is a pussy way of finding out about your imprint by going through one of her friends, but I knew if a question about me was asked she would tell her friends better then me. And seeing as how Kim is too loved up with Jared, Marie was my other option.

I walk out of the classroom with Marie as the bell rings and stop short as Marie crashes into Jake. I reach forward and grab the back of her jacket so she doesn't fall on her ass and watch as her eyes meet Jake's and the shock that fills Jakes face.

Looks like someone has imprinted I think as Jake continues staring at Marie

"Marie, haven't you got gym to get to?" I ask breaking the staring contest

"Yeah" she whispers before heading off down the corridor

"You know I get the sense of déjà vu" I smirk

"Why?" Jake asks looking at me

"Well with Jared and Kim, Kim had the biggest crush on Jared and then he imprints on her. And it's the same with you and Marie as she has the biggest crush on you, god knows me and Nik had to listen to her ramble on about you this morning"

"Shut up" Jake sighs

"So when are you going to tell her?" I ask as we head to gym

"When are you going to tell Nikki" he shoots back at me

"I need to gain her trust first" I sigh "She likes me but I know she is still hurting from the death of her friend. And If I put something like this on her shoulders she might just run"

"You so have got it bad" Jake laughs "When Nik knows the truth remind me to thank her for taming you"

"She hasn't tamed me" I sigh

"She so has, you haven't phased out of anger since she got here and you imprinted on her. You are a much better person to be around"

"Shut it man" I say pushing his shoulder lightly

Jake just laughs and we walk into the gym and see Nikki, Marie and Kim sat off the side, the three of them laughing. I raise an eyebrow as I see Nikki pulling funny faces and look to the teacher to see her taking the piss out of him.

"Looks like someone gave her an energy drink" Jared smirks

"Jar" Jake and I sigh

"What" he asks innocently "She looked tired"

I sigh and run a hand through my hair as we walk over and sit against one of the walls waiting to find out what is happening in class today, if anything is happening. All three of us look over to where our imprints are talking amongst themselves, their laughter hitting my ears every now and then.

* * *

_Nikki's Pov_

"So he just stared at you after nearly knocking you on your ass?" I ask Marie

"Yeah, we had a full staring competition until Paul stopped it?"

"I'm surprised you didn't faint" I chuckle

"I think it's cute" Kim comments

"You would seeing as how you used to be gaga over Jared" I smirk "Oh wait you are still gaga over Jared"

"Shut it" Kim blushes

"The only one not gaga is you Nik" Marie smirks

"I don't get gaga over a guy" I shrug "I don't see the point of acting like a love sick fool"

"Okay then what about a guy acting like a love sick fool" Kim asks

"That is just annoying when a guy acts that way. I mean why change all because of a girl, if the girl loves you she will take the way you were before you fell in love"

"She basically your saying you don't want a guy changing all because he loves you?" Kim asks her eyebrow raised

"Yep" I say popping my 'p' "That's exactly what I am saying"

"You're a weird one" Marie comments

"So I've been told, and now I need the bathroom thanks to the energy drink that Kim's oh so loving boyfriend decided to give me"

"Hey you drank it; he didn't force it down your neck"

"He didn't have to" I smirk

"I have a question and I know it's off topic but what is it with school, it seems as though half of the teachers have no idea what they are doing?" Marie says looking at me and Kim

"I was thinking that seeing as how we didn't have tribal studies, in biology we pretty much had a free period and now in this one"

"It has to do with the murders in the woods" a girl says next to us

"What murders in the woods?" I ask her

"Haven't you heard, four hikers have been killed already. And the teachers are on edge about it"

"Damn" I whisper

I look to Kim to see her fidgeting and think nothing of it as I look to Marie and see her looking as shocked as I am. My whole body tenses as I realize I have gone into the woods twice and each time I could have been killed by whatever it is that is killing people. I breathe out slowly and stand up as the bell rings; I walk past the girls telling them I need the toilet and run off in the direction of the girl's bathroom. I run in and into one of the toilet stalls and do my business.

As I go to leave the stalls I hear someone enter and sigh as I close the toilet lid and sit on it pulling my knees up.

"So I see your current arm candy is Paul Walker" one of the girls comments

"Yeah, he is so hot I was wondering when I would get my claws into him" Another girl giggles and I feel jealousy run through my veins

"I thought he was interested in that Nikki girl, Nikki Uley" the first girl comments

"Who would be interested in her, she nothing more then a filthy half breed?"

I growl under my breathe and stand from the toilet and unlock the door silently as I listen to the girls talk about me, I open the stall door and lean against it, both fake blonde bimbos applying lip gloss to their lips.

"At least I am a half breed not a fake" I say making them jump

"Oh it's you" One of the girl comments "I can see why Paul has chosen me" she says making her friend laugh

I growl and walk forward and grab her hair and throw her head forward making it smash off the glass mirror. She screams out and I smirk before rearing my fist back and slam it into her friends face. I drop the hold of the slut's hair and head out of the bathroom and over to my locker, the halls empty apart from the principle who is walking towards me.

"Nicole what has just happened, I heard screaming" she asks

"I hit two girls" I shrug "And don't worry I'm heading home. So how long am I suspended for?" I ask

"Three weeks" she sighs

I nod and grab my back pack and walk past her and out the school doors, I growl in annoyance as I remember that Paul gave me a lift and begin thinking about what the slut said. Are her and Paul really together, was his confession that he loved me really a ploy to get be in bed and seeing as how I didn't listen he had to go to one of the fake bitches.

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**So I made this chapter longer then the small one I posted last night**

**And yes I had to add high school drama, as it's the only way I can milk the story out up till Nikki finds out about the wolves.**

**Anyway I hope you like it**

**Let me know what you think.**

**Nikki's outfit is linked on my profile as it always is**


	8. What the hell

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**So I updated again because I have written ahead by a few chapters. And I wanted to give you guys something to read as I am a nice person.**

**OH and I know I said I'd milk the story but this chapter kind of wrote itself so that's why it ended the way it did.**

**Secrets Seal Our Fates has also been updated so check it out**

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_I'm Lying here _

_Thinkin' 'bout you _

_No More tears _

_Fighting for you _

_So Don't throw it in my face, in my face _

_I know what I did to you _

_And don't make me feel guilty _

_Keep blaming me_

_I still want you_

_**Don't Say Goodbye – The Veronica's**_

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_Paul's Pov_

I walk with Jake and Marie to lunch, Kim walking behind us, Jared's arm around her shoulders and her phone placed firmly to her ear. I begin looking around for Nikki and sigh when I don't see her. We stand behind a group of freshman who seem to be more interested in talking then actually getting some food.

"Did you hear what happened in the girl's bathroom after third period" A freshman says in front of me

"No what?"

"Nikki Uley kicked Rebecca Lawson and Emma Robertson's asses" the first freshman laughs

"You kidding me?" the second one asks

"Nope, Nikki smashed Rebecca's head off the glass mirror and punched Emma. Emma's eye looks as though she was hit by a boxer and Rebecca is in hospital with mild concussion and a big ass cut on her head"

The freshman finally decides to grab their lunch and my head begins swirling with the information, if Nikki got into a fight it means she is expelled. But why would she get in a fight, she normally tells me she is going to hit someone so I can get her away from the fight the minute it is finished. I sigh and grab some food before heading over to the table with the others, a chair empty from where Nikki is meant to sit.

"I can't believe Nikki got in a fight after gym" Marie comments

"She had a reason" Kim sighs before glaring at me

"What did I do now?" I ask shocked at the harshness of Kim's glare

"Nik has just rang me and told my why she got in the fight, apparently Paul over there is Rebecca Lawson's new arm candy and also Rebecca called Nik a filthy half breed" Kim says to Marie

"Are you kidding me man" Jake growls looking at me

"I am not Rebecca Lawson's arm candy; I don't even know Rebecca Lawson"

"You sure" he growls

"Yes Jake, you know I haven't looked at another girl" I sigh and he catches the underlining tone of my voice.

"Looks like the old Nikki is back" Jared laughs "Fighting people who call her a half breed"

"I wondered how long it would be" Jake chuckles

"Did she fight a lot?" Marie asks

"Her and Paul" Jared laughs "They were always getting kicked out of school to do with fighting"

"Nikki started it" I say in my defense

"That's it just blame Nikki because she isn't here to defend herself" Jared laughs

"So are you going to see Nikki and sort things out?" Marie asks

"After school, if I skip again my mother will kill me" I sigh

"I don't think your mother is the one you have to worry about" she says patting my arm

"Yeah" I whisper before dropping my head and push my tray away.

My thoughts begin running a mile a minute at why Nikki would hit the girls all because one of them said I was their arm candy. Fuck I am so stupid, for the most part I forgot that she was my imprint and that her finding out that I might be cheating on her would cause her pain. I groan out as I realize I once again have to apologize to Nikki, something I seem to be doing a lot. I can't do anything right when it comes to Nikki, but what else could I expect she is the female version of me but more stubborn.

The bell for end of lunch rings and I sigh as I stand up and follow Jake to our next lesson, my whole thought process revolving around Nikki and how I am going to apologize to her this time.

"I keep messing up" I groan

"You and Nikki are bombs waiting to go off" Jake laughs "Seriously you two are so alike it's scary. Though I think the scarier bit would be if she phased into a wolf herself"

"Don't even say that" I sigh

"We're lucky she is half and a female" Jake shrugs

"Can you please get of the conversation about my imprint and her becoming a wolf" I growl

"Sorry" he sighs holding his hands up

I shake my head and sit down in my seat before dropping my head down onto the wood, Jake laughing from behind me.

This imprinting business sucks ass.

* * *

_Nikki's Pov_

"How could he do that to me" I growl pacing around the front room, my hands tightened into fists as the conversation the bimbos had float around my mind. The front door opens and I snap my head up and relax a little as I see my dad

"You got suspended on your second day" my dad sighs

"They called me a half breed" I growl "You know I hate bitches who call me half breed"

"Sorry baby girl" he sighs "Well seeing as how you're suspended for three weeks you might as well work in the garage that way you have something to take your mind off things"

"Okay dad, starting tomorrow?" I ask

"Yeah" he nods "I've got to run, I have a truck in that is spitting oil everywhere the minute the car is started. You going to be okay"

"Dad I'll be fine, I just need to calm myself down"

"Okay baby girl, here is some money to grab some food" he says handing over some money

"Thanks dad, see you later"

He leans over and gives me a small hug and places a soft kiss to my forehead before heading back out the rental car, I chuckle softly as I begin wondering when he is going to get his own car. I drop down onto the sofa and look to the ceiling as I feel my anger disappear to be replaced with sadness. Why are these emotions hitting me every time I think of Paul and that bimbo? Seriously this is getting annoying.

I look at the time and see that I have three hours left before school gets out and I decide to grab a nap and maybe talk to Paul once school gets out. I close my eyes and breathe out deeply; sleep hitting me within minutes and my dreams are filled with Paul, something I have gotten used to happening.

After what seems like hours later I am woken up by a knocking to the door, I look at the clock to see that I've been asleep for five hours and sigh as I push myself off the sofa and walk over the door pulling it open.

"Jake" I say shocked

"If it isn't my favorite friend who likes kicking someone's ass" he smirks

"What do you want Jake?"

"I want to know what happened" he sighs

"Simple one of the bimbo's called me a half breed" I shrug

"And said that Paul was her arm candy" he smirks "Which must have pissed you off"

"No" I lie

"Come off it Nik, I know you like Paul. Anyone with eyes can see it"

"Jake I really don't want to be having this conversation" I sigh

"I know, but just a warning Paul is coming over here in about an hour" he sighs "Please listen to him"

"I'll listen" I nod "Then kick his ass"

"Nik" he sighs "Just let him get his side of the story across"

"Okay" I nod

"See you later" He gives me a hug and places a kiss to my forehead and walks away

I shut the door and walk into the kitchen and turn the coffee pot on deciding that if I am going to talk to Paul it is best I do it awake. Once I have a steaming cup of coffee in my hand another knock comes to the door and I sigh as I walk over and pull the door open to see a distressed Paul looking back at me. I walk past him and sit on the porch swing setting the cup of coffee on the table in front of me.

"Nik" Paul whispers

"Talk"

"I am not with Rebecca Lawson, I don't even know her and I know she called you a half breed"

"Yeah which is why I hit her" I shrug "But how do I know you're not with Rebecca, I mean I know of your reputation"

"Nikki" he growls

"What" I growl standing up "What is it, because I didn't sleep with you, I didn't succumb to your advances you had to go to the first slut you could find. Was telling me you love me the first lie you could pull out of your ass in hopes that it would make me fall to my knees in front of you"

"No" he growls, his body trembling "You mean more to me then that"

"Really" I say raising an eyebrow "Because I don't really see how that can be true"

"You are a fucking bitch do you know that. All you fucking do is point out my flaws and won't give me the time or fucking day to sort them out"

"Well sorry Mr. Perfect but all you've fucking done is hurt me. For reasons unknown to myself Paul but I am falling in fucking love with you and when I heard Rebecca say that I wanted nothing more then to kill her and tell her you're mine" I growl "But thanks to the way you've treated me I don't even want anything to do with you"

"WILL YOU SHUT UP FOR ONE MINUTE" Paul screams making me jump and shrink back "See that is your fucking problem, you won't see past what I've done. You won't open your fucking eyes and see what I've done when the two of us are alone"

"Do you fucking blame me?" I ask

"You are so fucking stubborn" he growls his trembling increasing "Why did I get fucking stuck with you"

"You are not stuck with me you pompous asshole"

"Fucking hell" he growls "You are going to be the death of me"

I begin walking backwards slowly as I see his trembling get worse, my gaze set firmly on him in a glare; he glares back at me and growls.

"You know what Nicole; you are not worth my time"

"Well guess what Paul; I don't give two flying fucks what you think. As far as I am concerned I hope you fucking die"

My eyes widen as the trembling from Paul gets worse, before he doubles over in pain. I go to step forward but what happens next causes my eyes to widen and fear to run through my veins causing me to freeze on the spot. Stood in front of me where Paul was a few minutes ago is the grey wolf from the woods.

"What the hell" I sigh before passing out, my head hitting against the porch railing.

* * *

**So Paul has just phased and caused Nikki to pass out**

**And its official Nikki needs some sort of counseling for her moods doesn't she.**

**Anyway let me know what you think**.


	9. Forced Love

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**So this is the aftermath chapter.**

**Hope you like it. And I tried to stop Nikki being so moody.**

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_And you can see my heart beating_

_You can see it through my chest._

_Said I'm terrified but I'm not leaving_

_I know that I must pass this test_

_So, just pull the trigger_

**_Russian Roulette – Rihanna_**

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"You are an idiot. Why did you phase" someone growls, I recognize the voice as a female's

"It wasn't intentional. She pissed me off" A male says and I recognize that voice as Paul's

"She always pisses you off. What is new this time?" the female voice growls again

"Whoever is growling can you shut up" I talk my voice hoarse

"That would be Leah" a voice sighs above me

I crack my eyes open and blink a couple of times to remove the haziness and look above me to see my uncle Sam looking down at me, worry and sympathy in his eyes. I look around the room and see everyone looking at me.

"What the hell happened?" I ask as I recall Paul changing into a wolf

"Can everyone leave" Sam says and I hear a superior tone to his voice which makes everyone leave. Paul looks at me, an internal battle going on in his eyes on whether or not to deny my uncle or go ahead.

"Paul, Leave"

His eyes snap to me and I see the hurt in them before he lets Jacob lead him from the room. I sit up and groan as a dizzy spelt hits me and Uncle Sam lays a hand down on my shoulder to steady me. I look at him intently as he sits on the coffee table in front of me.

"Nikki do you know the legends" Sam asks

"No" I sigh "Dad never told me them, saying I was better off not knowing"

Sam sighs before he begins telling me the story of the Quileute tribe, as he is telling me I notice that whenever the subject of imprinting comes up he seems to talk quickly and move onto the next part of the story. As he finishes telling me I stare at the wall behind his head, all of the information about vampires and shape shifting men, and female counting Leah, runs around my mind causing me to feel sick.

"Nikki" Sam asks gently

"Monsters" I say turning to look at him "You're all MONSTERS"

I jump up from the couch ignoring the thumping in my head and run out the door, I see everyone gathered outside and shake my head and take off in a run off the direction of my house. The calls from the others being heard behind me, I ignore their calls and reach my house opening the door and slam it behind me, I head to my room and drop down on my bed and begin crying, letting all the frustrations from the last few days and also the feelings from the information I had just learnt.

I hear a whine outside my window and get up off the bed and wipe my eyes walking over and looking out to see the silvery grey wolf that I now know as Paul lying next to the window under the tree that's near it. I lean my head against the glass and stare into the wolf's eyes and feel my heart break as I see the hurt swim around his eyes. I shake my head and walk back over to my bed and throw the covers back before climbing underneath them, I sigh as the silence of my room and the soft whining of Paul cause me to feel uncomfortable. I climb back out of the bed and turn on my ipod and switch it to one of my playlist's and climb back into the bed allowing the sounds of Avenged Sevenfold to float out of the speakers.

* * *

I laugh along with my dad as I begin working on my car, I decided to totally remodel it to it's not anything like it's predecessor. I glance to the right to see Embry and Jake watching me wearily as though I'm going to scream and shout at them, much like I did with Sam. I didn't mean to call them monsters but how did they expect me to react after being told a story like that. I sigh as my dad walks away and place in my ear phones blocking out Jake and Embry so I can focus on what I'm doing.

As I re align the new engine I find myself thinking about Paul and my heart tugs as I think on what he can become, I know it sounds weird considering I called them monsters yesterday but I am not afraid of him. Somewhere deep inside I know I can trust him and he will never hurt me. I sigh and place down my wrench and grab my rag from the side and wipe my hands before pulling out my earphones.

"Jake" I call

"Yeah" he says looking up

"Erm can you ask Paul to come here on my break" I ask

"Sure" he nods "When is it?"

"In an hour" I say looking at the clock

"I'll let him know" he nods his eyes still showing weariness

"Don't worry Jake, I'm not going to blow up at you guys" I smile "That's reserved for Paul" I chuckle

"You know, you really are the female version of him" Embry comments

"So you guys have a habit of telling me" I chuckle

"You need to be more understanding with him Nik" Embry says walking over to me as Jake walks out the garage, his cell phone in hand "Your words hurt him"

"How" I ask

"You're his imprint"

"Okay now today is the second day I've heard that phrase and I have no idea what it means"

"Paul is the only one who can answer that question" Em sighs

"You guys and your mysteries" I mumble

Embry chuckles "Don't worry Nik, your in on the mystery now"

"Awesome" I reply sarcastically

Em laughs and walks back over to the car he was working on and I turn and finish off my engine. An hour later I sigh and turn to see Paul leant against the garage door, I smile at him weakly and he returns it. I wipe my hands off on my rag and place it down as I walk towards Paul, hooking my ear phones around my neck as I go. I walk past him and keep walking, I sense him behind me and sigh as I turn to look at him once I know I'm away from Jake and Embry's prying ears.

"You okay?" Paul asks me

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

"Yes, Nik I was going to tell you but I needed to get my head around things. This imprint business is new to me and with you being as stubborn and broken; I didn't know where I stood"

"Paul" I say softly

"Yeah"

"What is an imprint?"

"I was hoping you didn't ask this question" he sighs

"Please Paul, I don't know what one is and I am utterly confused. If you love me as you say you do, please tell me"

"An imprint is when a wolf meets his soul mate. Basically once we look in the eyes of the person we are meant to spend our lives with nothing else keeps us tied to this earth"

"So you wolves are forced to love this girl?" I ask

"No, not forced" he sighs sitting in front of me "Basically we are pointed in the right direction. And no matter what happens we cant love another person the way we love our imprint"

"To me Paul that seems like a forced love" I sigh

"Not for me" he mumbles

"Come again?" I ask confused once more

"I loved you even before the imprint. But once I imprinted on you my old feelings were brought back and intensified by about a hundred"

"This wolf business is so mind boggling" I mumble

"Tell me about it" Paul mumbles

I sigh and look over his head, my eyes landing on the forest and I look out at it as I mull everything over in my mind. The heat on my face from Paul's gaze let's me know that he is awaiting an answer or something to come out of my mouth.

"What happens if the imprintee denies the imprint?"

"According to the legends the wolf and his imprint will feel severe emotional pain, and maybe even die"

"Awesome" I sigh

I look over to Paul and see him staring at the floor, his shoulders tense and I sigh as I get down and kneel in front of him. I cup his face and lift his head up so I can look in his eyes.

"Listen, this imprint business is a little heavy for me. But I know I feel something for you, and it isn't forced. But at the moment my moods are all over the place and sometimes I don't even know what my day is going to be like" I say staring him in the eyes so he knows every word is truthful "You need to be patient with me as there are going to be some days were I'm going to absolutely hate you, but against my better judgment I know I need you, and at the moment more then ever I need a friend"

He closes his eyes and pulls me into his chest and I wrap my arms around his torso, the warmth of his body soothing me. I feel him place a small kiss to my head and I know that deep down I have made the right decision. Because of my moods I know that sometimes I am going to think that my love for Paul and his for me is forced due to the imprinting, but I also know that he will fight to prove to me that he loves me naturally.

I pull back a little from his embrace and look up to him "Oh and no more visits to me in your wolf form. Your whinning his highly annoying"

He chuckles "I'll make a mental note not to do that"

"Why did you come last night?" I ask "I called you all monsters"

"I had to see you, know you were alright. When I say you faint and hit your head all thanks to me being a douche and phasing in front of you I felt so fucking angry with myself it took Jake phasing and sinking his teeth into my shoulder for me to see sense and calm down"

"You and your temper problems" I chuckle

"Like you can talk, I'm not the one suspended from school for three weeks"

"Eh them bimbo's deserved it" I shrug a small smile on my lips

"That baby, they so did"

* * *

**So did I manage to calm Nikki's moods down?**

**Let me know what you think**


	10. I Need Him

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**There were a few spelling mistakes in the last chapter**

**And for that I apologize.**

**If you see any in this chapter please let me know.**

**

* * *

**

_Your love was breaking the law_

_But I needed a witness_

_So pick me up when it's over_

_It don't make any difference_

_Will it ever be solved_

_Or am I taking the fall_

_Truth was there all along_

_Tell me how did we miss it_

_Cold Case Love – Rihanna_

_

* * *

_

When my lunch break is over I walk back to the garage with Paul, I see Jacob and Embry walking off and I know there shift is over. Well there work shift as Paul tells me they have patrol to do, a factor I really didn't want to know but I hide my distaste. I walk back over to my car and sigh as I see all the work that still needs doing on it.

"You did a lot in just a day" Paul comments

"I needed something to take my mind off things" I shrug "But there is still a lot of work to be done. Like designing it's new body, the interior and all the fun stuff"

"Who worked on the last one with you?" Paul asks

"My dad" I sigh

"You and your dad designed the last one" he asks slightly shocked

"Yeah, it was the only way I could get him to somewhat accept my career choice"

"About that" Paul sighs

"Don't worry" I smirk "I am not going to do anything to place myself in danger, I leave that up to you and the guys"

"Good" he smirks as he leans down and places a small kiss to my forehead

"You look tired" I say running a hand under his eyes

"I patrolled this morning and haven't been to sleep yet" he sighs

"Paul" I growl slightly irritated

"Don't worry" he sighs

"I'm allowed to worry"

"No your not, you'll get wrinkles" he chuckles

"Shut up" I laugh hitting his stomach "Are you actually going to do something other then annoying me"

"I have to, considering I am now on the clock"

My dad walks out and nods to Paul who heads over to the car Jake was working on. I shake my head and grab my ear phones and place them in my ears before turning my ipod back on. I get down onto one of the board things and slide under the hood of the car and begin wiring everything up, my thoughts on the guy who is over on the other side of the garage.

I grumble under my breath as I realize that I really need to get my emotions in check if I want to keep Paul, as I know that even though he is bound to me, he can still walk away from me. Something that I know will be down to me and my total idiocy about not being able to be the old Nikki, the one who didn't lose her temper all the time, the one who didn't push people away when they got to close to knowing why she was the way she is. I pull myself out from under the hood and look over to see Paul watching me, his dark gaze locked on me intently. I smile at him weakly and he nods before returning back to his work.

I walk into my dad's office and close the door behind me softly as I walk over and drop down into the chair and lean my arms on the desk before resting my head on top of them. The sound of Guns and Roses floats down my ears and I chuckle slightly as it's the song that was playing the day me and Paul became friends. Sometimes I just wish I could go back to them days, when I wasn't as broken as I am now. Would things have been different, would I have already been with Paul in the way I know he wants me to be with him. Would I be the good daughter that I know deep down my dad wants, and would I be the friend that everyone wants me to be. I laugh dryly as I realize I am being selfless and placing other people in front of me, my worries evolving around what others want me to be then what I want myself to be.

I know what I want to be, I want to be the old care free me, the one that loved everyone and never saw the bad in anyone. The person who always gave second chances and never judged anyone, the person who no matter what she was going through was always there to listen to other peoples problems. I sigh and stand from the chair and walk out of the office and back into the main garage to see Jared stood talking with Paul; he looks over to me and smiles. I smile and wave before walking over to where my dad is.

"Dad" I say taking an earphone out of my ear

"Yeah baby girl" he asks softly

"I'm going to head home if that is okay, my head is hurting me from the fall yesterday"

"Okay" he nods and hands me the car keys

I smile and lean up hugging him before placing a kiss to his check, I place my ear phone back in my ear as I walk out to the car and climb in; I look in the rear view mirror to see Paul watching as I start the car up and begin the drive home. I change directions and begin heading in the direction of the cemetery where my mother is buried. I pull up and climb out of the car locking it behind me before taking the path that will lead me to where my mother now lies, her whole finally resting place. As I walk nearer I see the blossom tree and smile, I chose where she should be buried as I remember when I was a child she used to thread blossoms into my braids and I thought it was fitting that she should be buried under a blossom tree.

I walk nearer to her grave and feel the tears well up in my eyes as I drop down to my knees and lay a hand on the stone, my thumb running over the indents that spell out her name.

"I miss you Momma, I am in so much pain and I don't know what my cure is" I whisper "I want nothing more then to turn back time to when I wasn't hurting, when everything was solved by a hug"

I wipe at my tears and sigh as I look up at the sky, the clouds moving slowly and smile.

"Sometimes I wonder what I want in life, but now I am certain in what I want, and that thought scares the hell out of me. I want Paul; I want to grow old with him by my side always assuring me that things will be okay. I know I never believed in the white picket fence life but with Paul things are different"

I smile as I continue telling my mother's grave all my thoughts, as I speak each word it feels as though a great weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I feel much better. A sense of longing feels my body as I think of Paul and stand up and place a small kiss to my mothers grave saying I will be back soon and walk back to the car. I shiver as I realize I'm not wearing a jacket and curse the weather. I stop walking as I see Paul leant against the bonnet of the car, his gaze set on me.

"How long have you been here?" I ask

"About five minutes, don't worry I didn't leave the car"

I nod and walk towards him, he opens his arms and I wrap mine around his torso, the heat of his body warming my cold one instantly. I feel Paul sigh and wrap his arms tightly around my waist as he buries his head into my neck.

"Feel better" he murmurs

"Totally" I whisper "Now I want to go home before I become an ice cube"

"That's why I'm here" he chuckles

"Hmm but I can't use you just for your warmth"

"You could use me for anything you wanted" Paul comments making me laugh

"You are such a pervert"

"Maybe so" he laughs "Come on"

He lifts me up and opens the passenger door after I unlock the car and places me inside before running around to the driver's seat. I hand him the keys and he starts the car up and begins the drive to my house. I reach over with my left hand and link my hand with his right one. He looks to me and smiles softly before returning his eyes to the road.

It was then and there that I new I needed Paul more then I thought I did. And I knew I was going to fight with everything in me to keep him.

* * *

**Eh it's short and sort of fluffy**

**Let me know what you think**


	11. IMPORTANT NOTE!

Hello everyone. It's been a while huh?.

Well I have some news for you. I have slowly been writing updates, and hopefully by Sunday 24th April I will have new chapters out for the stories.

BUT!

There are two stories that are getting deleted. And one story is getting re written.

The ones being deleted are:

**Teach Me How To Live**

**Angel In Disguise**

The one getting re-written is

**Will We Achieve our Forever**

In place of these two getting deleted I will be posting a new Paul story. One I've been writing for a while.

Also I will be taking over the writing on my Cousins Jasper story. She lost all interest in it and seeing as I was the beta for it, I adopted it and have been slowly writing chapters for it.

Anyway if you want to leave any comments about what I've said then please do, if not I cant wait to read your reviews once I get the stories updated.

Miss you all

Nikki-Chaos


	12. Reasons

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**READ THE AUTHORS NOTE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE CHAPTER PLEASE!**

* * *

_You find your faith that's been lost and shaken_

_You take back what's been taken_

_Get on your knees and dig down deep_

_You can do what you think is impossible_

_Keep on believing, don't give in_

_It'll come and make you whole again_

_It always will, it always does_

_Love is unstoppable_

_**Rascal Flatts – Unstoppable**_

I groan as harsh light attacks my eyes and I close them again. I count to ten before slowly opening my eyes, adjusting them slowly to the harsh light. I glance to my side as I feel something hot and see Paul sprawled out on the bed next to me. Soft snores leaving his mouth causing me to giggle softly at the innocence radiating off him, I make a mental note to never tell him that.

I shift myself out of Paul's arms and climb from the bed and head into the kitchen. I stop short of the silence that is radiating around the house and walk over to the fridge where a note is located.

_Baby girl,_

_Didn't want to wake you and Paul up so I left._

_The two of you are on shift this afternoon._

_Love you._

I shake my head and scrunch the note up before placing it in the dustbin. I glance around the kitchen and my eyes land on the clock to see its nearly midday, I curse softly at how long I slept but brush it off and set about cooking some food for me and Paul.

I begin cooking something simple as my mind drifts to last night after we got back from the cemetery, Paul told me everything. From how he became a shape shifter to the imprinting, when he told me about the imprinting I was a bit dubious, I mean how would you react to being told that you are forever linked to one guy. But Paul promised to never rush me into doing something I don't want to do. A small fact I was grateful for.

As I put the finishing touches to our breakfast come lunch two warm arms encircle my waist and I smile as I lean back into his chest and sigh contently.

"Smells nice" Paul says, his chest rumbling underneath my back

"I thought seeing as we got up late I might as well cook some food before we both have shift later"

"Well thank you"

I smile and lean forward again and get back to cooking as Paul walks around the bar and settles down onto one of the bar stools. I hand him his plate and he smiles before I walk round and settle next to him and begin eating.

"One thing you never answered last night"

"What's that" he asks turning his head to look at me

"About Bella Swan"

"Oh Leech lover"

"Come again?" I question

"About two months ago she was left in the forest by her vampire boyfriend Edward Cullen, and now she is toying with Jake's heart"

"Nice" I sigh

Paul continues telling me about Bella and I cant help but feel somewhat sympathetic for her, whilst the other half of me feels angry, as I agree with Paul. Once Fuckward, as Paul calls him, comes back she will go to him and leave Jake in the lurch.

"So he isn't accepting the imprint because of this Bella girl"

"Yeah, but he isn't fully ignoring Marie, he is being her friend but he isn't submitting to the imprint because of Bella"

"Can I smack some sense into the bitch?"

Paul chokes on his food and I smile sheepishly before turning my attention back to my food.

"You're too violent"

"And your not"

"Touché"

We finish our food and I head into my room and grab some clothes getting changed, cursing the fact that I cant grab a shower due to the time. Once dressed I head back to the kitchen where Paul is and smile.

"Ready"

"Yeppers"

He chuckles and we head out of the house, I lock up the door and throw Paul the keys before heading to the passenger side of the car, he climbs in the driver's seat and starts up the car. I lean over and begin fiddling with the radio and smile as one of my favorite country songs come on the radio.

"Didn't know you liked country"

"Some songs I do, but not a lot of them. I'm more a rock and roll girl"

He smiles and I shake my head as we drive towards the garage, we pull up just as Jacob and Embry leave. I wave to them politely before walking over to my car and sigh.

"Way too much work to be done" I grumble

"You know you could always ask for help"

"True" I shrug "But I'm stubborn and want to do it myself"

"Fair enough"

The two of us drift into a comfortable silence as I work on my car and Paul works on one that is already in. I smile to myself as I find myself falling back into the old Nikki, the one who was carefree and not so bi-polar.

"Are you ever going to race again?" Paul asks breaking the silence

I look up from the car hood and over to him to see him leant against the side of the truck he was working on, wiping his hands on a rag.

"Probably not" I sigh

He nods and asks no more, something I am glad about. I mean I loved racing an all but I promised after B died that I wouldn't race no more. And I don't intend to go back on that promise, not unless I have a good reason to.

* * *

So I still need a beta for this story. Want to be one then let me know.

Also there are two chapters up of Will We Achieve our forever. I have re-written the first chapter and of course finally managed to get a second chapter out. So go read that please.

And also my new Paul story is out, so if you want to check that out then please let me know. The story is called **'I'm not An Angel'**

And the Jasper story I adopted from my cousin is posted as well, its called **'Lost and Found'**

Review this chapter and let me know what you think. Sorry it's short but I'm trying to get back into the swing of writing after being out of it for so long.


	13. Challenge

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

* * *

_Every night I scream your name _

_Every night I burn _

_Every night the dream's the same _

_Every night I burn _

_Waiting for my only friend _

_Every night I burn _

_Waiting for the world to end_

_**The Cure - Burn**_

I look over at the clock to see its time to clock out and return my gaze to my car. A small sigh leaves my lips as I notice how much I do have left. I grab my rag off the place on top of the engine and head towards the office where my dad is.

"What's up baby girl?" he asks smiling softly as he sees me

"Can we move my car?" I ask

"You don't want to boys to see huh?"

"Not really" I smirk

"Yeah I'm going to be late tonight anyway, so I'll move it into the back area"

"Thanks"

"So what's left to be done on it?" he asks

"Well the engine and the frame are done; I have to design how I want the bodywork and the art that's going on it. Which I'll do on my computer and make sure the guys don't see. And then of course there's all the wiring and shit to do"

"How long do you give yourself?" he asks

"A few months" I shrug wryly "I don't want to rush it"

"Well take all the time you want" he smiles "But if we get busy then you will have to help with the other cars"

"I know daddy"

He smiles and I walk out of the office and over to Paul and lean over resting my head on the spot between his shoulder blades.

"Tired?"

"A little" I say my words muffled by his back, at some point he'd gone shirtless and I nearly hit my head off the engine.

"Well it's time to clock out anyway"

"Do you have patrol later?" I ask

"Not till midnight"

"Stay with me" I whine like a little kid

"Of course"

I smile into his back before placing a small kiss there without noticing I did. I untangle myself from Paul and walk back over to my car and being putting everything away. Once done I clock to two of us out and follow him to the car.

The car ride home is mostly silent as I sit there and let my brain argue with my heart. In the end my heart wins and I smile to myself as I come to the conclusion to let Paul into my heart. Be it one step at a time, but still its some progress.

**Paul's Pov**

When she placed that small kiss to my back I nearly trembled with a new sense of desire. Luckily I managed to control myself and finish what I was doing. On the drive home I watch Nikki out of the corner of my eye and see her smiling to herself.

As much as I want to know what she is smiling about, I choose not to ask. Instead I bask in the calmness that is radiating around us. All too soon we pull up to her house and she climbs out of the car and I follow before locking it up and following her into the house.

"Want something to eat"

I look at her like she has three heads and she giggles, a carefree sound that I love to hear, and promise myself to make her do more.

"Shouldn't have asked should i?"

"Not really" I shrug

She shakes her head and heads into the kitchen, with me following like a little lost puppy.

"Oh I forgot to mention, there's going to be a bonfire tomorrow night?"

"Is there?" she asks glancing at me from the cupboard in which she was looking

"Yeah" I nod "You kind of have to come"

"Because I'm an imprint?"

"Basically"

"I'm not busy so sure" She smiles

I find myself smiling and let out a small sigh as I begin thinking on these last months. How many times I told myself I didn't want to imprint, and then when I did I wanted nothing more then to make her fall in love with me instantly. But I know I have a long way to go, as hell she was broken when she arrived.

And I know for a fact that even though she covers it up, she is still broken now. But getting better, slowly, but still she is getting to the old Nikki that I fell in love with.

I stand from the stool on which I was sat and head into the living room and over to where the DVD's are, and smile as I see the racing ones.

"What are you smiling at?"

"Nothing"

I turn to see her leant in the doorway of the kitchen, one of her eyebrows raised.

"Nothing I swear"

"Yeah, I believe you" she teases

"I would"

"And why is that?"

"Means I don't have to make you"

"Like you could" she challenges, a smirk gracing her lips.

As she continues staring me down, her eyes a blaze with emotion and a smirk on her perfect lips I cant help but get horny and decide to turn back to the DVD's before I do something that will make her hate me.

"You win this time" I mumble

I hear her laugh softly before I hear the movements of pots and pans. I decide on a movie and pop it into the player leaving it on the main titles and head into the kitchen to help Nikki. I smile as I see her cooking, her bottom lip between her teeth as she concentrates on something.

"Need help?" I ask softly

She nods and points to the other side and I nod before walking over and begin cutting up the vegetable that is in front of me. I glance at Nikki out of the corner of my eye and cant help the smile that is on my face.

I know I have a lot of work ahead of me, to get her to allow me over that brick wall that is around her heart. But I love a challenge, and seeing as Nikki is my reward. Then I am defiantly up for it.

* * *

I don't like this chapter. I tried re-writing it but it still turned out crap

Anyway let me know what you think.

REVIEW PLEASE


	14. Baby

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

_And I said,_

_"Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone._

_I'll be waiting, all that's left to do is run._

_You be the prince, and I'll be the princess,_

_It's a love story, baby, just say, 'yes'."_

_**Love Story – Taylor Swift**_

It's been six months since that day when I decided to let Paul into my heart and everything has been going fine, well somewhat fine. I mean hanging around with shape shifters isn't exactly a walk in the park.

About three months ago, Paul and I finally started dating after being together unofficially. I mean any moment I could when he wasn't on patrol and I wasn't working we would be together. So we finally made it official.

Another change in me is that I am back to the old Nikki, I am no longer a drama queen and I don't break down so much anymore. There are some times when I will, like if I find a picture of B and Me, but that's simply because I blame myself for her death. But then again who wouldn't.

I never ended up going back to school, instead opted to be home schooled, and rushed through the work without even a second thought which left me enough time to work on my car, something I was happy about.

Speaking of my car, it's a few days away from being finished; all I have left to do is all the wiring for the speakers and radio. And then I have to finish the interior seeing as it all matches most of what is on my car, the art I mean.

I decided to have a wolf on the front bonnet, not just any wolf but a silver grey wolf with a full moon behind him with somewhat of a night coloring which takes up the entire car. Basically the color of the car is midnight blue. I should have said that in the beginning huh. Down the sides of the car I have wolves running but you can't see the color of them, they are just black outlines. And then on the back it changes to a girl hugging a wolf, again you cant see the color of the wolf as its black and so is the girl outline.

For the interior of the car I got the initial B on the seat headrests, my way of including B in the new car. My dad asks me why I call her B, it's simple really, It hurts too much to say Melia, and her nickname was Long Beach, but half of the time we all called her B after her surname of Bolt. Yeah she was called Melia Bolt. After that my dad didn't ask another question.

I'm happy with the way the car is, and my heart weighs heavy knowing I will never race it.

"BABY"

I smile and grab my rag and rush out of the room where my car is and close the door behind me and rush over to Paul throwing my arms around his neck.

"Missed me" he chuckles

"Mh-mm" I sigh

He chuckles softly and lifts his head back and looks down at me, I find myself lost in his eyes and jump slightly as he places his lips against mine. I smile into the kiss before locking my hands behind his neck deepening the kiss. He pulls back to abruptly for my liking and he smiles as he sees my pout.

"Later"

"I'll hold ya to that"

"You always do"

I smile slightly and look out the window and sigh seeing as it's raining.

"Did you find Jake?" I ask turning to look at Paul

"No" he sighs and I feel disappointment rear its dirty head inside me.

Ever since Bella and Edward sent Jacob a wedding invitation, yeah did I forget to mention he came back? Jacob has disappeared and no one can get a hold of him, and because of his stupid ness we are all watching Marie, hoping she doesn't do something stupid.

"Baby don't think too much about it, he'll be back"

"I know" I smile "Do you want to see the car?" I ask

"You nearly done?" he asks and I can see the excitement in his eyes

"A few days"

"Come on then show me"

"Close your eyes and no peeking; if you peek I'll be upset"

"Okay no peeking"

He closes his eyes and I grab his hand and lead him into the other room, I place him at the side of the car and smile before turning to look at him.

"You can look"

His eyes open and land on the side of the car, they widen as he looks to me and I bite my lip before gesturing him to look at the full car. I watch intently as he walks to the front and his eyes land on the big wolf.

"Baby"

"I like wolves" I shrug innocently

He chuckles and walks to the other side and reaches the back, I see his eyes taking in every detail and bite my lip harder. For some reason I want to know Paul's reaction the most, I know I love the car but if he doesn't then, I don't know. He glances to me and smiles, a smile only reserved for me.

"I love it" he says strolling towards me

"Really" I ask biting my lip

"Really" he nods

"Shame I'll never race it"

Paul cringes slightly as the sadness enters my voice and leans down bringing me into a tight hug. I place my head in the crook of his neck and sigh.

"You should do one more race"

I lean back and look at him, questioning his sanity

"What?"

"You should do one more race, in B's honor"

"I don't know" I sigh shaking my head

"Come on you know people in Seattle right, racers" He pauses and looks at me, I just nod weakly not trusting my voice

"So why don't you see if they can hook you up for one more race"

"I'll think about it"

He just nods and brings me into his arms again, I sigh and take a deep breathe allowing his woodsy scent to fill my lungs.

"Oh I'm kidnapping you tonight by the way"

"Really" I mumble

"Yep" he chuckles "It's my night off and I want to spend some time with my lovely girlfriend"

"Would that have anything to do with me lying on my back" I ask smirking up at him

He returns to smirk and winks causing me to laugh, last week we finally gave into the sexual tension that surrounded us and since then whenever we are left alone, we end up having sex. Trust me I think I've had sex in a bed once, up against a wall about four times, in a truck. And yeah I'll just stop there.

"You read my mind baby"

"Well not tonight"

"Why?" he asks pouting

I bite my lip and will myself to not give in

"I'm bruised to hell, that's why"

"And"

I shake my head laughing at his disobedience and sigh "You are not going to win"

He smirks and I see something glint in his eyes before he leans down and begins slowly kissing my neck, his hot breathe running over my skin causing my knees to weaken and my will to be shot to hell.

"We'll see about that baby"

"Cheater" I grumble

"I did not cheat"

"Yes you did" I pout

He lets out a loud throaty laugh before leaning down and places his lips against my gently

"I love you"

"I know" I smile

He returns it and pulls me into his arms, I sigh at the fact that I still can't tell Paul I love him, but he understands. Sometimes I wonder what I did to deserve someone like Paul. As underneath his bad temper he is the most patient man I know.

* * *

I re-wrote this four times and I still don't like it.

I wanted it to be cute and fluffy but it turned into a pile of shit.

Anyway review and let me know what you think.

This story is ending soon.

I don't know when but I know its ending soon.


	15. Epilogue

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer except the original characters Nikki, David and Marie. I also own the plot line.**

**I do not own any part of the Twilight series**

**READ THE AUTHOR'S NOTE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE CHAPTER PLEASE.**

* * *

**No song this time.**

I sigh softly as I stand next to my car, watching as all the other racers turn up and get ready. I lean my head back and look up at the Seattle sky to see the sun about to set illuminating the sky in red, oranges and purples.

"Baby"

I look over at Paul and smile, thankful that he came with me, without him I don't think I could have done this race.

"You okay?" he asks wrapping his arms around me

"I just want the race to start"

He chuckles and buries his head in the crook of my neck as I wind my arms around his waist. I take a deep breathe allowing Paul's scent to fill my lungs and calm me.

"You better win" Paul comments pulling back to look at me, his trademark smirk on his face

"I always do"

He chuckles and I lean up on my tip toes and press my lips to his gently before looking to the side.

"Its about to begin"

He nods and places another kiss on my lips and walks over to where the guys are, Sam looking proud with Emily stood in front of him, a wide smile on her face. My dad looking nervous and Jared, Embry and Jacob all smiling, I smile back at them, the smile growing in length as I see Marie tucked under Jacob's arm. I am glad he finally got over Bella and gave Marie a chance; after all she is his imprint. Seth soon walks over and I see he looks a bit down and raise an eyebrow but look away as I hear the announcer being calling the names.

When my name is called the whole place screams causing me to flinch at the intensity. I look to the side as I see one of my old team mates walk over and stand in front of me

"Welcome back Chaos"

"Good to be back" I smirk

"Kick there asses"

"I plan to"

He nods and walks to the microphone and announces what the winnings are and if anyone wants to place bets they better do it now before we start. We are all called to get in the cars and I do, losing my self inside my mind as I do. As I don't need distractions, I need to just win this race.

Once seated behind the wheel I start the car and get it ready, I watch as the girl stands in front of the cars waiting to announce we can go.

"This one is for you Mel"

As the flags go down I slam down on the accelerator immediately landing in first, laughing as I do.

The rest of the race is a blur in making sure I stay in first, which I cam in by the way. As I climb out of my car and am announced the winner I smile and look upwards. Paul runs over and brings me into a tight hug and I laugh returning it.

"Told you I always win"

"So you did" he laughs kissing me gently

Once congratulated by everyone and receive my winnings I walk over to Paul who is leant against my car, his legs crossed at his ankles. His arms crossed over his chest causing his already tight shirt to look tighter. As I walk closer he pushes off the car and walks over to me.

"Marry me?" he blurts out as he comes to a stop in front of me

"Come again?" I ask shocked

"Marry me" he repeats staring me deep in the eye

"Yes" I smile

He smiles widely and picks me up spinning me around before settling me back on the ground. He reaches into his pocket and produces a ring and slips it onto my ring finger, I smile and look up at him, small tears gathering in the corner of my eye.

"I love you"

"I love you too"

He brings me into a passionate kiss and I lose myself in it until the guys, as obnoxious as they are decide to break it up. I smile and we all begin chatting, wanting to prolong the time we have to return to La Push as much as we can. I see Seth stood off to the side and walk over placing an arm around his waist.

"What's up Seth?" I ask gently

"I imprinted" he sighs

"And?"

"She's a kid Nikki"

My mouth falls into a perfect 'o' shape as I stand staring at Seth, shock probably written all over my face like neon sign.

* * *

I tried as hard as I could to do another chapter but it didn't work. And instead the epilogue wrote itself.

I loved this story but at times it felt as though I could have done it better, but for me it was a learning curve.

I would like to thank everyone who read and reviewed. I love you all, and your reviews are what kept me going.

If you are interested, as I mentioned in this chapter, Seth Imprints and I am going to be doing a companion fic to this story, which is from Seth's Pov called **'Never Say Goodbye'**. Nikki and Paul will be making an appearance in the fic but it is mostly about Seth and his imprint. Starting with how he met his imprint and of course this little tid bit of where he tells Nikki and Paul.

The first chapter of Never Say Goodbye is Posted if you are interested


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